Hell's Hazbin Heroes

Hello Rosie

Nico's POV:

After Charlie & Vaggie return from Heaven, Charlie retreats to her room while Vaggie tells us that she's a former exorcist and the upcoming Exorcism will start here, at the hotel, with us.

Niffty: "So, like, where are your wings?"

Vaggie: "Niffty, I don't have-"

Angel: "Did you ever think maybe she's sensitive about her lack of wings, just like her lack of tits?"

Niffty: "Yeah. Where are your tits?"

Vaggie: *sighs* "Any other questions?"

Husk: "I got one. How come every time Charlie talks to Heaven, we get in deeper and deeper shit?"

Vaggie: "It's not her fault. Angels are just-"

Angel: "Liars?"

Me: "Untrustworthy pricks?"

Angel & I fist bump as Vaggie continues.

Vaggie: "Difficult. But Charlie's trying her best."

Husk: "Yeah, well, her best is turning out real well so far."

Angel: "And where is Miss Fearless Leader anyway? Isn't it about time for another 'doomed-to-fail' plan?"

Vaggie: "She's upstairs. Coming up with something, I'm sure, in our room. Alone."

Alastor: "Hmm."

At that, Alastor teleports, supposedly to Charlie & Vaggie's room, so I follow him to help keep the peace between him and Charlie and honor my half of our deal/relationship.

Alastor: "Oh, Charlie, you look an absolute mess."

Charlie: "Ugh, go away, Alastor."

Charlie turns away as Alastor sits at the edge of the bed.

Alastor: "Now, now, is that any way to act after picking a fight with all of Heaven and dooming everyone you love?"

Me: "Not helping, Radiohead."

Charlie sits up with an annoyed look.

Charlie: "Nico's right. I have enough on my mind without hearing your sadistic idea of a joke, asshole."

Charlie turns away as she rolls onto her side so Alastor lies beside her.

Alastor: "Who's joking?"

Surprised, Charlie yells and falls out of bed as I catch her.

Alastor: "You have a captive audience downstairs waiting to hear what kind of inspiring performance you have planned next."

Charlie taps my arm, so I gently place her on the floor.

Charlie: "Ugh, I can't. How can I face them after failing them all so hard? They came here to be saved, and all I gave them was more pain. I'm just as bad as the cruelest Overlord in Hell. Maybe worse. At least they don't go around giving false hope."

Alastor: "Well, I never expected to see such a miserable display of self-loathing from you."

Charlie: "Oh, fuck you, Alastor. All you do is stand there while you watch us struggle and fail. I don't know how you can enjoy all this suffering so much."