Maya’s P.O.V
So far it’s been two weeks of me stuck in a stupid hospital. And it has not been fun. You would’ve thought that I would be all happy now that I don’t have to be around my parents. But the truth is, it’s the opposite. Well, kind of. There’s not really a difference. I still feel the same way. Trapped with no way to get out. Trapped inside my brain with no possible way to return to the outside world. Alone and trapped.
My original reaction to waking up in the hospital made it seem like I was okay and happy again. But you can’t bounce back that quickly. Louis thought that I was okay when I woke up. That I wouldn’t go back to that depressing state I was in. But boy was he wrong. If anything, I’ve gone deeper into that depressing state. Further beyond depression. Definitely no where close to “normal”.
Do you want to know what makes it even better? I’ve gotten a diagnosis! They ran some tests when I woke up and it turns out I have quite a few mental disorders. Of course I already knew that though.
A while ago I was diagnosed with anxiety, obsessive compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), sleep terrors, and dyslexia. And yes, all of them are mental disorders. But I guess life decided that all that wasn’t enough. That I needed more stuff going on in my life. So depression, anorexia nervosa, and bipolar were added. Well, isn’t that a list?
The sound of cheering brought me out of my thoughts. Within seconds, Louis and his other friends were plowing through the door.
“Guess what!” Louis shrieked eagerly. I didn’t respond, just looked at him. He didn’t say anything so I sighed.
“What?” I spoke. Well, whispered. For the past few days, my throat has been really dry and I can’t really talk. I’m losing my voice.
“You can come home tomorrow!” he announced. I let a small smile appear on my face but not really because I was excited to be getting out of here. Yes, this place is annoying and I hate it. But I don’t really want to have to go to an orphanage. Seeing Louis happy just makes me smile, I guess. There’s something about his smile that just gets me. I don’t know what it is. Just him, I guess.
His smile faded off his face when he noticed my lack of enthusiasm. He pouted and came over to the side of my bed.
“What’s wrong, love?” Worry laced over his voice as he spoke. A pang in my heart made a smile appear on my face. For Louis’ sake. I hate seeing him upset. Even though I’ve only known him for two weeks, I feel some sort of attachment to him. Maybe it was because he saved me.
I shook my head and mouthed ‘nothing’ to him. It was obvious that he didn’t believe me but he didn’t say anything else which I was thankful for. There was an awkward silence for a while and I silently prayed that someone would break it.
“So Lou, are you gonna ask her?” Niall asked excitedly. Throughout the two weeks I’ve been stuck here, I’ve really gotten close to these boys; as much as I hate to admit it. I mean, it’s not that they’re bad or anything. But I didn’t really want to know them. As mean as that sounds.
But if I had to pick one of the boys that I liked best, it would be Niall. He’s the only one who doesn’t try and get me to talk. I can clearly see it on his face that he wants to know, though. Thankfully he doesn’t try to get me to talk about it though. It seems like he’s the only one who understands that I’ll tell them when I’m ready. Not that I’m ever planning on that but...never mind that.
I looked over at Louis expectantly. My throat was still killing me so I wasn’t going to try and talk again. He just shook his head at Niall in response. I shoved his arm trying to get him to ask me whatever question it was and he sighed.
