𝐄𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐏𝐒𝐄

'touch of love' ✓

-Chapter one-

If love wasn't supposed to hurt, then what was it supposed to feel like?

Even the tiniest parts of her body ached as if it had been put through a shredder and those pieces were pulled apart again. The worst pain of all? Looking into the mirror and seeing less and less of herself each time. Because love was cruel and love took and took. Amelia was painfully aware her body and mind would be painted with her mother's love forever.

Her bruised hands ghosted over the notebook that was placed on top of the wooden desk. Side after side letters she'd never send. Some were addressed to Luke some to Clarisse. She wrote every time it felt like invisible hands were suffocating her. When she felt like the world was too much, when she felt as important as one singular corn of sand in a desert. It had happened more often than she'd like to admit. It helped her remember when she was alone, and they were at camp.

A loud sound made her jolt and the notebook fall from the desk.

A bird had flown into her milky window, it seemed to be a bit confused but flew away shortly after. She stared at it. It was raining, storming even. The rain pattered against her closed window and ran down the front of the house. Why would a bird be flying? Amelia tilted her head. The bird shook itself then flew away as if nothing happened. Impossible.

Somehow it reminded her of herself. Confused, helpless and always colliding with walls she didn't even know were there. The only difference was that she never got up at all. As if someone had a foot on her chest keeping her pressed to the floor.

Amelia shook her head. The bird had gotten lucky. With a quick look at the clock, she saw the hand was nearly on eight. Her notes had splattered all across the floor but there was no time to be wasted on it. A quick shove of her foot and the papers ended crumbled under her dresser. Cursing herself she firmly closed the door of her room, leaving the notebook and its contents. She straightened out the blouse she wore, even though there weren't any wrinkles in it.

Slowly she walked down the small steps of her house. The floorboard squeaked. Not a good sign for her luck.

Pure white walls, a single flower in an aged blue vase on a small shelf next to the front door, the scent of roses so overpowering that it burning in her nose, everything seemed normal. But what could be considered normal in this house? Any other person certainly wouldn't call the water damage on the ceiling normal or the Mould that grew worse each time she saw.

Standing in the doorway to the kitchen she stopped. The petite red-haired woman, with her nice little outfit and the perfect rose lipstick seemed almost innocent. When you saw her like that, you'd never imagine her in a house like this with a kid like her. That was the point, appearance. Looking out the kitchen window nervously she saw exactly what she thought, nothing. Her stepfather's car was gone from the driveway, they were alone. The little bottle holding her mother's pills still laid untouched on the kitchen table-

A sudden noise made her focus on the other woman's hands. Yet, they weren't what made the sound, it had sounded metallic. The hand moved out of the way and a familiar ring came into sight.

Like a reflex her right hand caressed the skin of her left that was usually covered by said ring. She had gone through her room again? Amelia gulped, this was not going to end well. "You lied to me." Her voice sounded so cold almost like a robot. Amelia was used to that, used to just her mouth that moved and her otherwise frozen expression. After all this time she should be used to it at least. Just for a moment, Amelia wasn't sure if she had said anything at all.

"Lying is a sin. Sinners must always get punished, you know that. I don't want you to go to hell. You're my only daughter and I love you." If she didn't know better it would have sounded disappointed, to her it only sounded harsh. Embarrassment made her cheeks redden. She wasn't embarrassed by her relationship to Luke. They were in love and that was supposed to be a good thing.