ambivalence ❣ larry

5

Monday. Louis fucking hates Monday's. 

He's still not speaking to his mum. She drops him off to school as usual but they don't say a word to each other for the entire journey. Louis doesn't like it but in a way, he's relieved. He's dreading today and he's not sure if he even wants to put up with Zayn and Niall today. He's trying to get himself in the zone to go to lessons today. He was awake most of the night again last night, over thinking the day ahead. Thankfully after his little wanking mishap, he slept pretty well all things considered, thanks to the copious amounts of weed he smoked. If it wasn't for that, he'd be pretty much dead.

"Good morning, sunshine." Zayn smiles at Louis.

A groan escapes Louis' mouth. "Don't even start."

"You look rough as hell." Niall says. Oh, if you only knew.

"Shut up. Both of you." Louis mutters, putting his hand in his pockets and looking down at his feet.

"Oi, I didn't say anything." Zayn says, placing a hand on his chest. Louis looks up at him with a glare.

"You didn't need to. Your face said it for you." Louis can't be fucked with them either, he concludes.

"How long did you sleep for last night?" Zayn says, concern slightly peeking through his words.

About an hour. He slept for about an hour, maybe two. Louis shrugs. "Dunno. Not long enough, obviously."

"Why did you even come in? You don't look well at all." Niall says and places a hand on his shoulder. Louis shrugs Niall's hand away, he doesn't want to be touched right now. He feels dirty after the other night. He's had 3 showers since.

"Today's the day I start actually going to lessons, remember?" Louis mumbles. Why did he agree to try? The last thing he wants to do is sit in a lesson. He feels Zayn's hand slap his back.

"Oh yeah. Good luck with that, bro."

Will he just fuck off? Louis is really not in the mood. He lifts his head and looks at the masses of students walking towards the school. The thought of seeing Harry right now makes Louis want to vomit. "Can we head in early this morning?" Louis mutters, taking a deep breath to try and suppress his nausea.

"Don't push your luck, mate." Zayn says with a laugh. Louis looks at him. Why does he have to be a prick?

"Come on. Don't be a knob." Louis is basically begging at this point. Every second passing is a second closer to Harry arriving at school.

"What's the rush?" Niall says, his brows knitted together. Because he doesn't want to see the guy he hates who keeps making his dick hard for no fucking reason, that's why.

"It's cold." Louis says quietly with a shrug.

Zayn looks at him blankly. "You are such a wimp."

Louis looks at both of them expectantly, waiting for either of them to give any sort of sign that they were going to come with him. Niall and Zayn look at each other with a confused expression. Louis is aware that he sounds like a pussy right now but he's getting increasingly panicked by the prospect of coming face to face with Harry. After a few more seconds he turns around and starts walking towards the school. 

"Fuck the both of you." He calls out, loud enough for the other two boys to hear him.

Why are they being like this? Louis' sure that if he actually expressed that he was struggling, they'd help him, but that's not good enough for him right now. Louis couldn't even imagine what they would say if he told them about the shit show in his head right now. Louis' jaw tenses as he walks towards' his first lesson, art. Okay, this can't be too bad. He can do this. He sees Mrs Hensford, the art teacher, sitting at her desk.