Nobody knows

2008 2009

Owen knock softly on Alex's room were Meredith and Alex were crying silently.
"Meredith, Alex do you know what is this?" Owen said showing a little red book
"Nop. Where did you find it?" Alex said
"I was looking into Cristina's room and I saw a drawer that she never let me touch. She told be I never touch that draws until she's dead. And well.." Owen said
"What does it says?" Meredith said with a groggy voice probably like that be as the lack of use for the last hours
"Well I found a bunch more but I only grab this one" Owen said
"Read it out loud" Alex said curiously
Owen read:
October 30, 2008
Today the man that pull out my icicle came back. I remember quite right this name (that by the way is Major Owen Hunt) but apparently my name is hard to remember and hard to say because he call me 'Cristine'. Meredith implied that he had left the military life to be with me. After today is hard to believe. I thought he was a jerk. Well especially when he left me with four pigs to take care of. What did he thinks I am? A veterinarian?. Later when I did all the great procedures to the pigs I began to think he was less jerk. Even myself was impressed by what I did. I did a liver resection and a bowel resection to Babe, a thoracotomy, a lobectomy and a splenectomy to Wilbur, an anastomosis and a colon resection to Reggie and a carotid graft and tumor resection to Paddy. Then he told that I had to terminate them. I spend my whole saving those pigs and now he says to terminate then?! Now I am beyond mad. At first when I saw those piercing blue eyes while kissing me I felt an attraction. But after those three strikes he was a total jerk. And then he told me this tragic war story and I couldn't think he was a jerk anymore. But still I was not going to get involve with an attending. I think that I already learned my lesson with Burke and I am going to be a cardio God so I have no space for relationships. And Meredith is still bugging me about moving in with McDreamy. What a great life I have.

"She had a diary" Meredith said in disbelief "I need to read more"
"I cannot believe it" Alex said "man she hated you" Alex said
"She did hated me that day. But even with her hating me I prefer that than this" Owen said
"You have another one?" Meredith asked
"A random one" Alex added
Owen started reading outloud again

October 15, 2009
Today the people fork Mercy West arrived. It was horrible. They are horrible. And you know who is more horrible? My boyfriend. I had a great surgery for Stab wounds and a pseudoanyeursm. And it was MY patient but Owen decided to leave to a new stupid pretty boy named Avery or something like that. This was just a horrible day. Between Meredith in bed watching stupid tv, the invaders, my boyfriend and the lack of surgery is awful. Today I missed Burke. I haven't miss him in a love time. But everyday that ha was here I held a heart. Now? I miss not that great cases because a pretty boy wants them. Thank god that Meredith was there to help me. I know she now has the great life but she understands why I was crying, because she is dark and twisty. And also one person that also understands suffering is Alex. Izzie left him. I mean come on Izzie! It's not fair on Alex. Okay she missed George, her best friend. I wouldn't make it if Meredith died, but I want people for me. And she has a husband that is a good guy and a nice guy. For reasons like that is that anybody is reading my diary before I die. Alex would be a pain in the ass if he knew I called him a nice guy. And also I learned that four (I learned that her name is Lexie) is also nice. Too "I love my daddy" but she's nice. I also miss George. He was the good one. I know I didn't show it and that I lost his confidence at the moment I started lying about Burke, but deep inside of me I cared about George a lot. And I know I have said that Owen is horrible (he was today) but I love him. I think he's it. He's the one.

After that an awkward silence filled the room. It was all finally hitting all of them. George was dead so as Lexie and Izzie. And Cristina.... Was also dead