Solstice

WAITING

I sat in my favourite armchair, unmoving. Renesmee had fallen asleep pretty quickly after I told her the news: that Jacob had asked me point-blank if her feelings towards him had changed, and that I'd been unable to lie to him. She'd raged at me at first, telling him that she had been the one who should've told him, and after her talk with Edward, she was going to go and find him; but after she'd shouted for a while, Edward had told her pretty sharply to cut it out, and she'd dissolved into tears. She too had buried her head in my lap and cried as if her heart was breaking. After I got her off to sleep, I changed my jeans for the second time that night and went to call Sam.

'It was awful,' I told him, my voice breaking. 'He asked me directly – I think he already knew – and I couldn't lie to him. I feel just dreadful.'

'Jacob has already come home,' Sam told me, his tranquil voice tinged with deep sadness. 'He went straight to Billy and he hasn't come back out of the house. Emily took over a casserole for them. I'll stop by in the morning and speak to him. Did you find out any information about the legend that Emily discovered in the notebook?'

'Yes,' I told him honestly. 'And I told Jacob, so he'd have the option. But it's complicated, Sam. It's not a straightforward procedure.'

'With a bond that goes as deep as the imprint, I am not surprised that the procedure is complicated,' Sam told me. He sighed. 'Thank you for all that you have done, Bella. You have been a good friend to Jacob. It is good of you to care for him in his grief.'

'I just want to be able to do more – to take his pain away –'

'No one person can do that by human means – or immortal ones,' Sam told me. 'The imprint is a blessing and a curse. We have never had such a situation as this. We can only hope that somehow, Jacob finds his way back.'

I hung up the phone and slumped in my chair, rubbing my hands over my eyes. My fatigue was, I was sure, all mental. But then, my head heavy on my hand and my whole body feeling as if it were made out of lead, I felt an irresistible urge to yawn.

I yawned, and yawned again.

Edward's eyes seemed to have turned to ice. He gazed at me, and I saw that he wasn't breathing. Mechanically, one of his hands chafed my wrist, trying to offer some poor comfort.

'What is wrong with me?' I whispered, my voice high-pitched with anxiety. 'Edward, I –'

'We'll get to the bottom of this,' he assured me, but his own voice was also too high to comfort me. 'Don't worry. We'll find out what is wrong.'

'Are there...' I smiled involuntarily; the question sounded so stupid in my head. 'Are there vampire doctors? Specialists? Of course not – Carlisle would've known about them. Or been a specialist himself.' Edward looked uncomfortable, and I nudged his arm. 'Edward? What is it? What?' I shook his arm a little harder than I meant, and he flinched; I cringed away, wincing at the thought of having hurt him. 'Please tell me.'

'I can think of two likely sources of help – one nearby and the other in Volterra,' Edward said reluctantly. 'The one nearby is Calvin O'Dowd. But I don't want to do anything, say anything, to put you – us – in his power. Please, Bella. Never let Calvin do you a favour. It's bad enough that he's already "helped" you. He's involved with some pretty shady elements, Bella,' he told me, holding my gaze. 'There's been plenty of speculation over the years that he's up to his neck in organised crime, but even the Volturi couldn't find evidence of that...'

'There's no way I'm going near Volterra, let alone admitting any weakness to Aro,' I said staunchly. 'No way. But there must be something Calvin wants. Something he can be bribed with, so we have the power. Honestly, Edward, I hate thinking like this, but this – the yawning – is making me go out of my mind. I can't stop wondering and speculating about why it's happening.' I looked at Edward's beautiful face with eyes that were as unhappy as his. 'So what does he want?'