Murder City

Chapter Thirteen

13 | Aurora Bennett

I take the top bun off my burger, picking up whats left before taking a bite. I hear Billie giggling through his drink, choking on it before regaining his posture once more. "What are you doing?" He asks, pulling the coffee mug from his lips. "Sesame seeds." I mumble, chewing, hoping that answer was enough. I take the top bun and I pass it to him, layering it on top of his scrambled eggs. 

Billie rests his hand on mine, gently tracing circles against my skin. The awkwardness settles in, I feel like whatever I say will be too extreme or too cliché, and If I don't talk at all, he'll think I'm boring and whatever we have going on will disappear. Now that I think about it, what is going on between us? We're on a date, but I still haven't officially ended it with Fletcher and I'm still trying to figure out what I want. He said he'd wait for me, but I think he's getting impatient. And if I don't make myself available soon, he'll move on, right? He could have anyone in the entire world, so why would he wait for me?

Billie takes a mouthful of eggs, smirking at me, "You know." He looks around "Its not as bad as I thought it was gonna be." The inside of the restaurant is much nicer than the outside. It used to be a light shade of red, to contrast the darkness of the roof, but now the walls are covered in pastel blue, with old pictures of the restaurant spread across the walls, along with black and white photographs of Oakland. "I guess they lack the money to fix the outside." This place is surrounded by other unpleasant buildings, and people often think this place is abandoned or a terrible place to be. Both are incorrect, but thats just my opinion.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." Billie leans over, kissing my hand, standing up to walk to the corner where the bathroom is, the sign hanging off by its last screw.

 I take a deep breath in. This place feels like home to me. I never felt unsafe here, even when my mother came here for the first time, her and my father didn't argue. It was peaceful between them for once. This is my happy place. I hate seeing Billie sat across for me instead of my father, but I'm slowly warming up to the idea of letting others into my more personal life, the deeper, safe parts. 

I look down to my food, picking up a fry, sweeping it into ketchup before taking it into my mouth. The salty taste overstays its welcome. The chair across from me slides backwards, then creaking under Billie's weight. "Hey again" I mutter, coughing into my elbow as my mouth dries up.

"Hey."

I look up, my eyes widening instantly, the eyes staring back at me aren't Billie's. I shake my head, feeling the breath escape my lungs. I feel as if I'm drowning, I'm scared, flailing in the sea of my problems.

Fletcher smirks, knowing the affect he has on me. 

I want him to leave me alone, I want to be free. I don't know why he keeps following me, since when we were together he'd push me away. Its not fair. I turn to the bathroom door, hoping Billie will come out, and finally rip Fletcher away from me. "Fletcher." I keep my voice steady, its hard, "Leave me alone." My voice cracks, I blink back the tears. He snorts, arms crossing over his built chest "Why should I? I'm just protecting my girlfriend." He leans in, his lips forming into a tiny smirk. I hate the way he speaks, not a specific word, just in general. His voice is so arrogant all the time. 

"I'm not your girlfriend." Its now or never. If I don't stand up for myself now, I never will. "I don't remember you breaking up with me." He spits back. He's got me there. I never told him to leave me alone because I was afraid. I knew if I was to break up with him, I'd do it in person. I knew if I broke up with him, I'd have to be in the same room as him. I knew if I broke up with him, I'd have to talk to him. I didn't want to do any of that, so thats why I held off for so long.