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what am i supposed to do if there's no you?
*.·:·.☽✧
If Celeste's heart was made of glass, it had been taken and smashed against a terrible surface, against a terrible truth that had killed her to realize. It had taken bodies and a scene of too much blood to make her understand that Marlene was gone. And worst of all, that she was never coming back.
The shattered bits of her heart lay scattered and shoved around, but Celeste couldn't find it in herself to care. Her head still reeled from that day. She remembered apparating so quickly that she nearly lost a limb. She remembered flying for the front door and seeing Lily and Alice on the floor, cradling a broken body.
A broken body that seemed too different from Marlene to really be her. Beautiful, lively, brilliant Marlene. Marlene should've woken and chided their overdramatic behavior. She should've laughed it off and reapplied her red lipstick. Marlene McKinnon was not a silent, bruised girl, left for the cold Earth to take in. She should have gone when she was smiling and grey, surrounded by her family and friends.
Not like this.
Anything but this.
Her glassy, open eyes still haunted Celeste. The last time she'd seen Marlene, she'd been laughing and winking. She recalled her saying, "Love you tons!" and whirling away. The memory of her voice sent her spiraling away into a sobbing and drunken state of disaster.
There had been a quick funeral, with some schoolmates and Order members. Dumbledore had not shown, but it surprised Celeste to see several of their old professors. She remembered McGonagall and Sprout, hastily wiping tears from their eyes. She remembered Dorcas, quietly sobbing in the back. Celeste faintly remembered her affair with Marlene back in school.
Unable to bear the death of her chosen sister, Celeste had turned away and gone home.
Home to Sirius.
She needed him, desperately. To cling onto him for dear life, and be her guiding light. Because internally, she was falling apart. Bit by bit, she had been chipping away.
Evan had been lurking around the house, late at night to wait for her. The only time he had managed to catch her, Celeste had denied him. That had sent him into a fit of rage, invoking a screaming match between the two. She had managed to escape that time. But now, she feared it might not happen again. She would prefer a screaming match any day.
It also made guilt grow in her. Guilt that Sirius was entirely oblivious to her situation. He had always avoided the topic of her duty to produce an heir, likely to soothe Celeste's worries. Or his own.
