Sacred Silence | A Tom Riddle Story

62: The opposite of homesick.

It wasn't rare for Shiv to feel alone whilst in the middle of a group of people, but today was an extreme. Her fellow Ravenclaws were packing up the last of their things hastily, chatting in exited high-pitched voices about their plans for this summer. Their dorm was littered with clothing and school supplies that wouldn't be needed for the next eight weeks.
In the middle of this mess was Siobhan, on her knees, absently raking her nails through Juno's soft hairs. If she just waited a little longer, if she never finished packing.. maybe she didn't have to leave at all.

But it wasn't that simple. At the end of the afternoon, she was supposed to be in London to catch a portkey that was arranged for her. It would take her to her parents' second estate in the south of Ireland. It was a huge mansion, yet not as big as the one they lived in during the rest of the year.
Shiv hated that it was smaller; it meant she was in closer proximity to her family at all times. To make matters worse, there would be a lot more family than she was comfortable with these upcoming three weeks. Her grandmother and both her fathers sisters, two horribly haughty-faced witches with an ego bigger than the mansion itself. And then she hadn't even started thinking about her cousins.. her amazing, perfect fucking cousins..

'Shiv, can I take this with me? Haven't finished it yet,' Flo asked, holding up a book.
Her hair was frizzy and she was still wearing a bright pink bathrobe. She had a happy, carefree look about her. Shiv felt happy for her friend, who since the night of the party had been blushing whenever Abraxas was anywhere near them, but she couldn't help but feel jealous as well. Flo had eight weeks of pleasant family time by the coast ahead of her, with her kind parents, dog and old friends from elementary school.
A stab of guilt for feeling jealous snapped Shiv out of it.
'Sure,' she nodded, letting go of Juno to continue folding a stack of clothes next to her bed. She noticed her hands were shaking a little.

'Are you okay, Shivvy?' Florance asked as she sat down on the floor beside her and picked up a dress from the pile to help fold.
'Me, yes, yes, I'm fine,' Shiv replied, a lot less convincing than she would have liked.
She reached over to her nightstand for a glass of water that she had put there, but her trembling hands knocked it off. The glass hit the wooden floor with a loud crack and shattered into a few large pieces, the water seeping into the clothes on the floor.

'Fuck-' Shiv groaned, folding her hands together and resting her forehead onto them. 'Fuck fuck fuck.'

'Well, you're obviously not,' Flo said patiently, and after resting her head on Shivs shoulder briefly, she started to pick up the broken pieces. All Shiv did was watch trough her folded hands, appreciating her friend more than she ever had.

About three hours later, the pair made their way down to the entrance hall, dragging their trunks behind them. Juno was walking in between the two of them, regularly slipping between Shivs legs and rubbing the side of her face against her calves reassuringly. The cat always sensed her restlessness.
Once they were settled in a carriage pulled by the invisible thestrals, Shiv took Juno onto her lap and continued to focus on her, desperately trying to ignore the nausea that was now whirling in her stomach.
Eight entire weeks. Christmas break was horrible, but it was short enough. Summer was unbearable.

When the scarlet Hogwarts express came into view at the distant Hogsmeade train station, the nerves became so overwhelming that it surpassed Shivs ability to feel them, and it left her numb.
She didn't remember much of getting out of the carriage, picking up Juno, or getting her trunk. One moment, she was feeling the thestrals come to a stop, then, she was boarding the train.

'We're a bit late.. most compartments will be full,' Florance sighed as she passed by Shiv and pulled her luggage with her through the train to find a spot. Shiv followed mindlessly.
Since this was their last journey of the year and everyone would spread out as soon as they got to London, there were no prefect duties for her to attend to. For the first time in a while, this was a relief to her.