Back To Eden

11

TW! Murder and self harm! If you feel uncomfortable, please skip this chapter for your own well being. Thank you.

I gazed into his eyes and leaned back into my bed defeated. I sigh and open my book to have it slammed and thrown across the tent, hitting the ground with a smack. I look up at IV confused to see him with his mask halfway up his face, showing his mouth and part of his nose.

"What the fuck dude?" I ask him with surprise. He leaned closer into me, his breath hitting my face softly.

"You never answered my question? Now," he paused and smirked as he scanned my face looking at my confusion. "will you tell me?"

I swallow the nerves that have made me refuse to talk and I grab the book off the floor, hanging to IV. He smiles and opens the book to the page I was on. I watch him curiously as his facial expressions turn from smug to horror.

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A rotten smell fills my nose as I find myself, again, covered in blood outside of Edens borders. I look down at the animal I have unalived and fall backwards onto the cold ground with shaky hands. It gets harder to breathe with each gasp of air as my lungs take, I watch the last movements and breaths of the deer in horror as I try to remember how I got here and what the actual hell happened.

My vision fades in and out, the cold fall air smacking my face as if it was trying to smack me back into reality. The feeling of gravity leaves me as I let my head fall onto the ground harshly and I suck in one last breath of air before bursting into tears. My sobs filled the air and hot tears pour down my face. I curl into a ball, hugging my knees into my chest my face into my jeans.

Why? Why am I doing this? I don't understand. I feel as if someone has taken over me and controls me as I am their puppet. I want so bad as to take my knife and cut those strings to let me free from all of this.

Maybe... I can take this all away...

I slowly get up and crawl to the bloody knife and sit carefully next to it, tears slowly still trickling down my face. I stare blankly at it and look away.

I don't know if I can do this.

All away Reilynn.

You can take it all away.

"No I can't do it!" I yell into the air.

Do it.

I cry louder. "I told you I can't do it!" I scream.

Fuck, just take it!

"No!" I take the knife without gestation and slash it over my wrist. I scream in pain as I watch blood rush out of my wrist, I hug it my chest and squeeze my hand over top of it to stop the bleeding.

You're mentally weak! You still obey over me. This wouldn't have happened if you weren't crazy!

I shake my head no violently as I my head gets fuzzy and my world swirls around me. The sounds my screaming ring over and over in my head like a bad song or my mothers lullaby on repeat.