Back To Eden

16

TW! Mentions of SH scars and venting! Please skip if need be!
I watched her hungrily as her chest rose and fell with much desire for me to touch her. She whined as I reached around her back and unclipped her bra letting it slip off her and onto the floor.

"Vessel..." She spoke quietly as I gazed at a scar, just below her chest. She crossed her arms across it, hiding her harm to her self.

"I don't understand." I whispered, tears brimming my eyes threatening to fall. She rolled her eyes and put her shirt back on. Reilynn pulled her hair back into a ponytail and looked at herself in the mirror.

"What's not to understand?" She said outloud, bowing her head in shame. I shook my head as I held it in my hands.

"You are the most-"

"Don't give me that fucking excuse. I'm beautiful? Pretty? Hot? Is that all I am? It is insanely hard to get myself out of bed every morning. I struggle brushing my hair because I feel like I can't continue on." She pulls in a shaky breath. "Some days I try so hard not to take a chance and end it all. I could get tons of compliments. But I'm still not enough! I know I am not worth the space in Earth. A waste of breath, a ruined creation of Sleep. I have let myself and everyone else the fuck down!" She slams her fist in anger against the table as tears roll down her face in the mirror.

"I just can't do it anymore." She whispers as she sinks down against the mirror. "I want it all gone. Please just take it away. I took hers away, I can't deal with the guilt anymore, Vessel please!"

"What? What do you mean you took hers away?" I asked. She started to cry harder.

"I killed her. I killed her. I killed her. You should do as the same to me. I'm a murderer and took a woman's life away as I should've took my own life awhile ago." Reilynn put her head into her hands. "I killed Melody."

I sat there. Stunned into my spot. Melody? Is dead? She killed Melody?

"I-" I paused taking it all in. "You are a murderer."

"But I didn't feel regret. I'm prisioned into someone I'm not. Or maybe my thoughts aren't as innocent as I thought." She calmed down a bit only tears falling out in streams. "I was covered in her blood. She was cocky, saying everyone was against me. She said that they were trying to kill me, I got tired of it and-"

"It happened just like that."

She nodded. "I went back past Edens grounds and killed a deer. I had a mental breakdown and hurt myself, but then I blacked out far away from were I was. I don't know how I got there but III was trying to wake me and help me with my cut on my wrist. I refused to go with him to camp and he got violent." She went quiet and leaned her head against the mirror, looking up at the ceiling. "I don't know how long he hit me. Or tortured. I don't know what to call it but it felt like years. I remembered thinking, this is it I finally get to die. But I didn't."

"I don't understand." I repeated.

She chuckled sadly. "You don't have to. I'm pyscho and that's all you need to fucking know. You should lock me in Sleeps chambers and leave me there for the rest of my fucking life." Reilynn turned her tear stained face towards me in a small smile. "I'm cold. I feel nothing. Do I know how to stop it? Not a goddman chance. But I did love you Vessel. Not as a brother but as a partner."