The Castle of Gold [Bk 2]

ch.20 I've got you

Niall exhaled slowly, almost disappointedly. Then he looked up at me, like it was painful for him to hear me admitting that I had an ounce of feeling for someone other than Harry.

I avoided his eyes and took another gulp of the beer. My head was beginning to feel light and airy, like I was on a cloud somewhere in Heaven, looking for my mom…

No wonder Niall drank so much; it was so much better to infuse the gold with the blue-black and blur the ugliness of reality. So much easier…

When I had enough self-esteem not to drown myself in alcohol, I looked up at Niall. Even Niall, the most carefree and casual guy I’ve ever met- looked at me with contempt.

I grabbed my beer and swallowed the rest of it. Niall got up to get me another and I drunk enough that I saw four blue eyes instead of two.

I don’t remember when or how, but I was sitting curled up in a ball and Niall was awkwardly patting my shoulder. He kept his distance, like he was didn’t want my tears would affect his nonchalant advising session. 

“What am I supposed to tell Harry?” I asked him hopelessly. My voice was quivering and Niall was afraid one more word would spring the full-on water works.

 “The truth” he replied back obviously.

I sighed in annoyance. No matter how I cut it; the truth would have to come out one way or another.

“But he’ll hurt Liam” I reasoned. I wiped away a tear with the back of my sleeve.

Then a cold shiver ran down my spine as I knew that Harry would do more than “hurt” he would kill Liam with one vengeful blow and slash him to shreds.

“So what?” Niall asked nonchalantly.

I stared at him with wide eyes.

“Niall, Harry can and very well would k-kill Liam” I stuttered.

Niall took another sip of his beer, like we were having a comforting conversation about butterflies instead of death and betrayal.

I finished my second or third can of beer. Niall was well into his third or fourth, but he was calm and collected. I was on the edge of a cliff and I was dangerously close to jumping.

Then he blinked and some sort of realization seemed to hit him.

“You’re in love with Liam” he spoke slowly, almost in a dream-like daze.

My chest tightened and I was sure I wasn’t breathing.

Then I shook my head hurriedly.

“N-no I’m not” I protested.

“Yes, you are” he told me.

I stared at him as if he had uttered a horrible curse.

“Angela, I can’t help you if you don’t admit everything first” he explained.

I shook my head again.

“But I don’t lo-love Liam. I love Harry” I declared, but I didn’t sound very confident and Niall knew that. But I was telling the truth; I do love Harry. I love him more than I have words to truly express.

Niall shook his head.

“Then why do you care if Harry hurts him? Why can’t you tell Harry that Liam kissed you?” Niall questioned. “And why did you let him kiss you?” he added quietly.

With every question, I felt my throat closing in on me. He was right. I was the dictionary definition of guilt and disloyalty. So I just sat there, waiting to have my picture taken so that everyone would know how horrible I was.