The Castle of Gold [Bk 2]

ch.64 To forgive

I woke up before Harry, but I didn’t dare wake him. His chest rose and fell softly and he clung to me like a young boy to his mother. His eyelashes were still moist from his tears and I leaned close to kiss his eyelids. He shifted slightly. I reached closer and took his hand in mine and kissed it.

His eyes fluttered open.

“Angie” he spoke in an even raspier, morning voice.

“Are you feeling better?” I asked eagerly. I had been waiting for months for my chance to comfort him, to try to take some of the pain that he’s kept hidden in his armor, and I finally got the chance last night.

Harry nodded slowly. He rubbed his eyes and realized that his lashes were a bit wet.

“I can’t-I can’t believe-” he shook his head and started to laugh, as if embarrassed that he had cried.

“Harry, there’s nothing to be ashamed of” I told him honestly. 

Harry cleared his throat uneasily. I reached for his hand and held it in mine.

“Yes there is, Angie. I’m supposed to be the one to comfort you, not the-”

“And who made that rule?” I interrupted calmly.

There was no written rule about a man being barred from showing any emotion besides aggression or sexuality. If anything, last night, as Harry’s tears mixed with mine, he was a thousand times stronger to me. The force of his hand was powerful, but the pain in his tears outweighed it by a landslide.

Harry laughed as if I were a young child asking why the sky was blue.

“No one, it’s just-” he tried to explain, but he didn’t have a real answer because there is no real answer or definition.

“Harry, the three minutes that you cried showed more strength than all the years you had been hiding the pain” I told him.

Harry looked into my eyes for a moment and swallowed hard. He knew that what I said was true, despite others who brush it off.

He reached close to me and held my face in his hand. He looked at his hand and then into my eyes.

“I love you, Angie” he whispered softly against my lips.

I smoothed a lock of his hair behind his ear and smiled.

“I love you, too”

***

We made our way to Jordan’s office again to finish last minute details. Jordan assured us that the wedding date is now on the 21st of May. Harry and I sat there on her quite comfortable chairs as she ran through a list of entrees and flowers and silks that were all in order.

I nodded and smiled at the right times. The details of the day really didn’t matter to me because as long as Harry was a the man I was walking to, I was wearing the dress that my mom helped me pick out and my dad could watch the ceremony from above, that’s all that mattered. That’s all that will ever matter.

I glanced over at Harry. The corner of his lips curled and he grinned at me. He took my hand in his and kissed his ring.

“Now I have a few questions about the guest list” Jordan spoke up.

I blinked and returned my attention to her.

“I understand it is a small gathering, but wouldn’t you like to invite more family or friends?” she asked quietly.

I looked down and then over at Harry. Neither of us had that many sympathetic relatives that would even care to come. Most of my parents’ family was dead or estranged. My mom’s family kept no contact after she married my dad. My dad’s family dealt with the kind of people that got my dad killed, but I do have two real uncles, Marco and Paulo.