DIRTY BLOOD | TR ✔︎

FIVE ➢ RIDDLE

A week has passed and I still will never understand muggles and their taste for odd music.

The disk spins around in the record player, the fallen pin bringing an odd tune to life.

My potions homework sits on my bed in front of me, the papers sprawled out in a disorganized group. The text book is off to my left and I flick my gaze from side to side to ensure I'm getting the correct answers.

The inky black swirls into the page, effectively filling in the bubble. Not a single scratch of ink is outside of the lines, not a space of white in the circle.

It's practiced control. Keep your hand steady but loose, neat but fast.

My father taught me that. Not in the sense of writing, but to learn to control myself and those around me. To have complete control over my emotions, over my memories, my thoughts, my emotions.

He wanted me to be able to block out the legilimens who might attempt to penetrate my mind. Dumbledore. Snape. Lucius. He never wanted his affairs discovered because of my lack of security over my own mind.

It took him years to turn me into the ultimate killing machine. To crack through my personality and wring out my heart of emotion. Years of torture to teach me how to keep minds from wandering askew into my own.

My brother, on the other hand, has learned nothing. Every step my father takes towards progress is responded with a leap back by Mattheo. It's my brother's way of rebelling, and I can't say I blame him for going against my father.

I did, too. But there's no use in trying to run away from a path already paved for you.

And because of everything my father put the two of us through, I'll never show vulnerability. I'll never give up control. Not to anyone. Not to myself. Not to a girl. Not to family. No one.

It's been a week since I've dug through Kaeda's room and I can't help but wonder what she thinks has happened.

I heard Theo telling Mattheo that she freaked out and is sleeping on Gryphon's floor, but I want to know what caused the spazz. Why is she so sure that it's not another Gryffindor girl?

It's not, but she doesn't know that.

I don't regret doing what I did, and that within itself is starting to scare me.

I've had one conversation with this girl—which ended poorly—and now my eyes search for her in every room, scanning faces for her own.

I wait every moment for her to turn a corner, to look at me, to talk to me, to walk past me.

I fucking crave her.

Am I going insane?

I shake my head, ridding myself of these repulsive thoughts and return to my homework. At the same time, the door flings open and Enzo and Theo stagger in, staring at me as they wait for me to acknowledge them.

"Yes?" I ask, annoyed.

"Do you have the—wait. This is Kaeda's favorite song." Enzo says, eyebrows creasing with confusion. Goosebumps shoot up my arms at the mention of her name. "I thought you didn't listen to muggle music."

Fuck, I want her.

"It's smart to take note of those my father wants to extinguish, Lorenzo." I answer, jotting down the answer to another question.

"Odd. Anyways, do you have the potions homework?" Theo asks, cutting straight to the point as he crosses his arms over his chest, watching as I scribble down answers.

"Fucking vultures, you two." I grumble, gesturing to my now complete paper.

The only reason I let Theo and Enzo use my notes is because Snape gives our house an additional five points if the homework is complete and at least eighty-five percent correct.