A race to your heart (Zarry AU)

16.- Life goes on 🏁

Harry's POV

After he left my room, I sat down on the floor, leaning against the door, and cried like a child. Taking a break from us, from Zayn was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made. It was a choice between my career and the love of my life. And it tore me apart and felt like a breakup. I just needed to focus on my career without having to worry about Zayn's jealousy. Was I being selfish? I don't know. I was so fucking confused and scared of my future in the F1.

A race day came again and I was barely able to focus. I ended up with a P3 finish, but my heart wasn't in it. Carlos won the GP, and I should have been happy for my teammate, but I couldn't help feeling empty. I knew Zayn wouldn't be there, but that didn't stop me from looking for him in the Mercedes garage, hoping for a glimpse of him that never came.

After the race, I headed straight to my hotel, avoiding the celebrations. I wasn't in the mood to face anyone or pretend to be okay. I told the team I wasn't feeling well, which was true in more ways than one. My heart ached from having to put an end to things with Zayn.

The shower couldn't wash away the sadness. I stood there, letting the water cascade over me, mingling with the tears I couldn't hold back. I was miserable but I had to keep up appearances, to perform my job on the track, while inside, I was miserable, falling apart. I have to show myself that I could do it with a broken heart.

A knock at the door pulled me out of my thoughts. For a brief moment, I hoped it was him, but I quickly dismissed the idea. Wiping my face, I opened the door to find Carlos standing there, a soft smile on his face despite the bruise from Zayn's punch.

"Hi mate, how's it going?" I tried to sound casual, but my voice cracked.

"Good, and you? I... I came to check on you," Carlos replied, his concern evident.

"Thanks, I... erm... come in," I said, stepping aside to let him in. "Have a seat."

Carlos settled onto the sofa, his eyes scanning the room as if looking for clues to my state of mind.

"Are you feeling better? I know something's off. What happened, if you don't mind me asking?" he said.

"Erm... well, it's a long story," I hedged, not wanting to unload everything on him. He nodded, understanding that I wasn't ready to share. "Want a drink or something?"

"I could use one, yeah," Carlos chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.

"Me too," I smiled weakly and headed to the mini-fridge. The tiny bottles inside seemed insufficient for what I needed. "I'll better order something from the bar downstairs. I don't feel like going out."

"Me neither. I just don't want to deal with the media asking questions about what happened with Malik," Carlos admitted.

After a drink that burned my throat, I started to relax, the alcohol dulling the edge of my pain.

"I've been so stressed lately, y'know?" Carlos said after a moment of silence.

"Tell me about it. I don't have time to be dealing with all this... stuff," I sighed, alluding to Zayn without mentioning him by name.

"Relationships are difficult, man," Carlos sympathized, pouring us both another drink.

"Do... do you have someone special?" I asked, curious about his own experiences.

"I had. We broke up a month ago. It's hard in this career. She wanted commitment, and I... well, I wasn't ready," Carlos explained. I could see the weight of his words on his shoulders, the same burden I carried.

"I know! I'm just starting in F1, and I can't risk it for anyone. I just can't," I echoed his sentiment, taking another sip of whiskey.

We talked about the pressure of being in one of the most prestigious racing teams in the world, the expectations of our team principal, and our personal lives. I learned more about Carlos than I ever had before. He came from an "old money" family, with a father who was a two-time rally champion. He was practically born into the world of racing, while my path had been different, more tumultuous.