𝐩𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞//𝐣𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲

𝓽𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝓶𝓮 𝓱𝓸𝓶𝓮,𝓬𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓽𝓻𝔂 𝓻𝓸𝓪𝓭𝓼

"I hear her voice in the morning hour, she calls me"

"Jennifer, what happened out there?" She asks me with that sweet, caring voice that wants me to rip out my ears because she is nice to me even if she is mad at me. 

Because she is too good for me. 
There's no one in the world like Emily. 

I look at her, trying to find the right words to not screw this up. 
To not lose her. 

"I just wasn't ready for people to know yet." 

"But it was just Nat. She's openly lesbian, and she wouldn't tell anyone. She is my friend, and she just wanted to know if I have a girlfriend now." 

"Emily, it's way more complicated than you think," I sigh and sit on the couch. 

"Then explain to me, please." 
She says it, and I see it in her eyes.

She is trying so much to talk this out with me. Emily told me a lot of times she doesn't like to fight. Snd doesn't like to have unsolved arguments. 

And I realized in that moment that I was the complete opposite. 
I run away from my problems; I don't solve them. 

I was always like that, and I always will be; I can't be changed. 

"Emily, it..." I'm stuck in words now. 

"Jennifer, all I want is for us to be openly together. I want to be with you, and I want people to know that."

“I get it. I get it. I also want us to be open together, but sometimes I feel like you expect me to come out when I’m not ready. I want to do it in my own time. I need that, and you have to respect that.” I say 

"Of course I do respect that, but I think that sometimes you are just ashamed of me. Of being with me."

This catches me off guard. I stop and turn my head toward her.

“That’s not it at all. It’s not like that. I’m just scared of other people’s reactions. Why would you think I’m ashamed to be with you?”

"I dont know. Im the first girl you have been in a relationship with. Its new for you." 

"Excactly...so I need a little bit more time, don't you think?" 
I say. I really don't want to get defensive and frustrated with her. Not with her. I can't. 

"But how much time, JJ?" 

I look into her black eyes and try to reassure her. 

“It’s not about you. I love you, and nothing’s going to change that. I’m not scared of other people’s reactions to you. I’m scared of other people’s reactions to us. Society is still not open to lesbian relationships, and we all know that. I don’t want to be seen as “a girl who’s dating a girl." I just want to be seen as a normal couple.”

I said, and I was never more proud of myself for talking about my feelings as I am now. 
I wipe the tears that slipped down my cheek. 

Emily looks at me and tilts her head. 
She comes to me and puts both of her hands on my cheeks.

"Well, unfortunately, not all people are born with a good heart and respect for others. There's nothing we can do about it. I understand that you are scared. Trust me, I've been there,but if you are going to hide in the shadow, you will never feel the sun on your skin. And sometimes you can get burned too, but trust me, I'll be here by your side...always. We are going to do these together." 
Emily says. 

And in that moment, I was sure I won the lottery. 

This woman loves me more than I could ever love myself. 
She's risking a lot, but she's ready to do that for me. 

Because she loves me. 
And I love her even more.

I give her the most generous smile and kiss her lips again and again.
 
There is something invisible between us that is pulling me to her every time we are apart. 

And I can't stop ignoring that anymore. 

 ☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

That night,we made love.
It's not just sex. It's different now. 
We spoke our hearts to each other. We wiped each other's tears, and now we are boned more than ever. 

What we do is passionate, with the full desire of each other. Its love, its emotions—it was what I wanted to feel for such a long time. 
It feels right,like it was made just for me. 

It was something that has been waiting here for me, and I just couldn’t find it through all these years.

I completely forgot about all the people who are going to hate me just because I'm happy now that I found myself and my love for women. 

I don't care what others are going to think; I spent too much time wondering about that. 

Too much time is spent trying to be perfect, and trying to be normal. 
To simply fit in. 

But I'm done with that now. 
Im not saying its going to be an easy way—not at all. 

Life taught me that nothing is easy to get,and even if it puts you down, you have to get up and not let your mistakes bury you deeper. 

Because at the end of the day, it's all you. 
It's your life; it's your body,your mind, and your heart. 
Your feelings and only your love. 
And it is entirely up to you as to who gets it.
Who you decide to share your love with. 

Because there are people who deserve it. 
And there are people who don't. 

And you will teach who of these people you can really trust. 

Hi! This is the end of this story. It was a little shorter, but I think it fulfilled its purpose.
I hope you liked it.
Of course, I have another wlw fiction planned, so you definitely have something to look forward to.
Don't forget to share with your friends so that it reaches more people.
Love you,take care, bye for now<3