Loosen Us (Loose Trilogy #3)

Chapter 2

Paano nga ba nabubuksan ang kabanata sa pag-ibig? Yung iba, magkabanggaan lang may red string na pa lang nakakonekta. Habang yung ibang naman, makita lang isang beses dahil nabighani, first move na agad. Panghuli, dahil magkakilala sila ng taon, may mahuhulog—pero hindi masasalo.

"I like you."

Three crucial words to express to someone. All the courage I had a while ago, feels faded. Tinignan ko ang mata niya, he looks worried and concerned about me. My knees were trembling while standing in front of him.

This may sound impulsive, but this is the only way I know to get closer of him. Kahit sa katunayang delikado ang desisyon kong ito, na kahit alam kong gumagawa ako ng sarili kong hukay upang palalimin ang nararamdaman ko.

Malabo, magulo na parang isang salaming napabayaan. But if this is the only effective way, then I'm willing to risk.

They say that for us to be able to move forward with this feeling—is through confessing. We need to loosen up.

I sound so brave while stating those three words. Neither so, I sound so impulsive by saying those. I stared at him directly in his eyes. His eyes speak the emotions that are hard for me to identify.

Parang sa isang exam na multiple choice, ta's hindi ako nakapagreview. Worse the subject is General Chemistry.

Just like his emotions, it was multiple. And I don't wanna guess it. I don't wanna assume in the end, then break my own heart.

Hence, do I already push myself to hurt my heart by admitting my feelings for him?

Neither so, I had a lot of reasons why I did this. Subalit mayroong nangingibabaw kung bakit. Being friends with him for almost four years made me feel he was still distant from me.

Tunog padalos-dalos man, ngunit matagal ko rin itong pinag-isipan!

I bit my lower lip and lowered my head. He is still speechless, and it makes me feel worse!

I can't accept rejection, but I did this? Wow, Kiara. You think about this for a month, ha? Pero wala naman na akong magagawa. I'm already stuck in this situation.

Maaaring tama nga ang ilan na masyadong mapusok ang mga kabataan sa henerasyon ngayon. Well, I can defend myself! I just wanna test the possibilities. At least walang nasayang, 'di ba?

Wala nga bang nasayang—masasayang?

Sa tagal kong maghintay ng tugon niya, ito ang sinambit niya. "B-but we're best friends."

"I know..." I smiled on him, without reaching my eyes. Pumasok sa isipan ko na isasagot niya iyon. Pero bakit ba? Bakit ba nasasaktan ako?

Desisyon ko 'to, 'di ba? Dapat panindigan ko.

Pero ang bigat, eh. Bakit ang hirap huminga?

Hindi pa naman ganoon kalalim ang nararamdaman ko 'di ba? On the other note, this also the reason why I confessed to him.

"I just... want to lighten what I felt." I honestly stated. Thus does it lighten the baggage inside me?

Our last day as a grade 11 student was the exact day of the awarding ceremony when I had that impulsive moment.

Sinakto ko talaga upang kahit papaano makapag-isip-isip din ako habang bakasyon. Magkaroon ng kapahingahan ang isipan ko. At upang mabawasan ang kahihiyan sa katawan ko.

But things happened differently. Our paths always meet each other. Iba talaga kapag iisang hangin ang nilalanghap namin. We're on a same circle; halos malapit din siya sa kamag-anak ko na taguan ko sa tuwing gusto kong takasan ang bahay.