Somewhere Only We Go (Editing)

Chapter 8

Kabir

"Be there in 10 minutes. Sorry, the meeting went a little long." I am standing outside the mall with the biggest smile plastered on my face. Anyone who sees me would probably think I have lost my mind. After an hour of going back and forth on this, I finally relented because I knew he wouldn't take no for an answer. Avi wanted to take me shopping, and I kept saying no because I already felt like a freeloader. Pretending to be his boyfriend for the party already is like getting a free trip to Goa all expenses paid, we leave in three days and I am not going to lie I am excited but also a little worried, mostly about Avi. Last time when I met his mother I wanted to take Avi far away from a woman who is so indifferent to his own son. Also something about the word pretending is making me uneasy. I know I need to keep reminding myself it is temporary. This was the biggest reason why I wanted to keep him at a distance.

The first chance you got, you jumped in his bed dude.

I didn't jump in his bed.

Oh sorry, my fault, he pushed you, you fell in his bed and then the noises that he worked out from you were enough to-

Shut up, you're supposed to be in my team. Stupid brain.

We are on the same team, obviously.

Yeah and what team is that?

Let Avi fuck you as many times as possible.

Yeah, I kn- wait what. Fuck you. Now I am hard just thinking about him. Thank you for that.

You're welcome.

"Hey," I jump at the sudden voice behind my back.

"Fuck Avi, don't sneak up on me like that." I can still feel my heart racing.

"I wasn't trying to. You were deep into thoughts, not my fault. What were you thinking?"

You fucking me. "Nothing important." Liar. I am ignoring you.

Before I turned around, Avi kissed me on the cheek and took my hand in his as we made our way inside the mall. Temporary, temporary, temporary. I need to keep reminding myself.

"I hope you didn't have to wait for long, the last meeting went for a little longer than expected, this is why I hate conference calls. But it was either that or traveling to New York and I didn't have time for that."

I smile at how domestic it feels. His cribbing about his day at work is more personal and intimate than sex. Guys like Avinash will never have a problem finding people to hook up with, but he struggles with opening up to people.

"Why are you smiling?" I shake my head.

"Nothing. Did you eat anything?"

"I had salad for lunch."

"Of course you did. You can't live on salad the whole day Avi." I tug at his hand and pull him in the other direction.

"Um, the store is that way."

"We are going to the food court first and you are going to eat something substantial." I look over my shoulder and Avi has an expression on his face I don't quite know what to make of.

Ten minutes later we sat at one of the tables, Avi got himself a Dosa. He kept eyeing the Coke in the fridge but for some reason didn't get it. So I got it for him with the mojito I am sipping.

"Want to share?"

"No, you need to eat. It's almost 7 and you had lunch around 1, if you can even call that proper lunch. Besides I had pizza for lunch. The couple I was working with ordered enough, I am still full." Since I don't have to start with the publishing house until next month, I thought it would be better to take on single-day gigs, like today for a pre-wedding shoot.

"Do you like doing it?"

"Doing what? Photography?"

"No, I know you like that. I have seen your work, only someone passionate about photography would click pictures like you do. That is why you were in the top 3 we selected for the interview."

Somehow coming from Avi those words mean a lot more than they would if someone else said it.

"Thanks. It means a lot."

"I was asking about the projects you take, like today. You told me it was a pre-wedding shoot." I nod not sure where this is going.

"So do you have something specific that you like? I am sorry I don't know a lot about photography so maybe I am not explaining it right."

I take a sip from the mojito in front of me. "No, I understand what you're asking. And to answer your question, it's not the worst thing. I know people who love being a wedding photographer. And they would any day do a better job than me in that department. But the thing is sometimes we don't have the option. I couldn't sit and wait for the opportunities I wanted."

"No that's not what I meant. Shit sorry Kabir I didn't mean it like that."

"I know you don't. It's okay don't worry. Anyways what I truly liked the most is something that isn't going to pay my bills at least not yet, so.." I leave the sentence incomplete because I don't know how to put it in words. Avi puts his hand over mine from across the table.

"What do you want?" He is looking at me and I know he truly cares and wants to know and not doing it to fill the silence.

"Um, I...I like portraits. To capture faces in a way that tells a story, stories which sometimes only the eyes can tell. I know it sounds a little extra but this was the reason I chose photography in college." Avi squeezes my hand.

"It doesn't sound extra, it makes sense." I take another sip from my cup and Avi returns to his meal.

"What about you? Did you always want to work in publishing?"

"Yeah, I always only knew books growing up. When I was in school, my father's secretary always got me the paperbacks of new releases. And I used to finish the whole stack in 10-15 days. This was one thing I always knew, I'll always work in publishing."

"You didn't think about writing?"

Avi smiles."No, writing isn't for me. I know how to polish a manuscript, give feedback, and find the best stories amongst the 100s of drafts. Basically, I love what comes after the drafting."

"So you love your job."

Avi hesitates a little but then nods. I want to ask further but he is done eating so I make a mental note to ask him later. As we make our way to the store I make him promise that he isn't allowed to get me anything too expensive.

"I won't. I will like it more if you get something you can wear on a more regular basis than an expensive suit that sits in your closet. Get whatever you like and feel comfortable in. However, I do want you to promise me one thing."

"What?"

"Let me spoil you a little and take care of you the way you deserve." My lips part and my heart races. Avi locks eyes with me and in that moment, in the middle of one of the biggest malls of India, something between us shifts. Something that feels more real and permanent.