There... I froze my insta account and deleted the app. It surely wasn't going to be much harder for me to become invisible again. Just until another hot gossip takes it's place or until Sarawat finds a new toy.
My fury got the best of me today. I knew that but I was feeling too stubborn to act on it.
Still, I forced myself to do the right thing and sent a message to Yin.
"I am sorry."
Just that... cause I wasn't in the state for a long talk. Not right now.
He called me again. I declined and sent a message again.
"I'm really not in the mood for a talk. Can I call you later?"
After that I threw away my phone and began to cry. Cry... until that heavy feeling in my chest lifted. I looked at the clock, and realised I'd still have time to close my eyes for a bit. I knew I was going to see a nightmare. However, my eyes weren't listening to me.
...
Of course, I was miserable at my dream too. When I woke up I just continued crying like I didn't just fall asleep for two hours?!
Finally, a splash on my face brought me back. I looked at my reflection in the mirror.
What was it? Five weeks? Six weeks? Since I met Sarawat.
I looked terrible! In only five weeks, I lost my ability to sleep without waking up every hour, ability to eat properly and I was stressed out all the time.
After my initial emotional reaction, I began to feel better.
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Just as I started to breath normally, I looked at my phone. It was an instinct reaction.
Huh.
What do you know.
Turned out Sarawat already found a new toy.
My friends sent a picture to our the group chat.
Jesus christ. It had been like five minutes! Sarawat already locked lips with his guy from his faculty.
He also deleted all of our pictures, my friends said. I didn't want them to be out there in the first place, he did.
But... seriously... wow.
If I knew it was going to be this easy, all it was gonna take me to sit with Yin, I would've finished things with him long time ago.
I thought... I don't know. I guess our relationship meant nothing to him. I didn't know he felt that way.
As if he was capable of feeling human emotion.
My friends were still informing me about social media updates.
