Of Mountains and Men: A Why Choose Romance

Chapter 15

Breakfast is strained to say the least. The girls are so full of energy and ready for their dads to take them to learn to ski. Between Andrew and I, ugh it is awkward.

James pulls me into one of the bedrooms closing the door behind him, "What's happening between you and Andrew. I thought after last night, and how amazing it was. I just don't understand what's happening." He cups my head between his hands, forcing me gently to meet his eyes.

I try holding back my tears, it simply doesn't work. They streak down my face as I sob out. "Charley asked Andrew if he'll be his dad. What was I thinking letting Charley be around my flings?" The tears start to leak faster.

James pulls me into his chest, "I'm sorry. There's no need for you to be upset." He cracks open the door, "Andrew come here."

A few moments later, Andrew rushes in the door, sees my face and wraps his arms around me as well. "I'm so sorry Charlotte, I didn't mean to upset you."

I push them both slightly away, wiping my face dry. "You didn't upset me." I clarify. "The situation we've created blending our families when we all know this is temporary. We shouldn't have done this. It's just going to cause the kids and us more pain."

Andrew bends down to meet my eyes, "I- we don't want this to just be a fling. I want you." He admits, brown eyes becoming slightly glassy.

James turns my head towards him as Andrew straightens up. "I want you as well. And we both know Michael does. We don't want this to be temporary. I'm not sure how all of this will work out. But we'll just take it day by day."

I nod, wiping my eyes once more. "So, we haven't ruined our children by getting attached to each other so quickly?"

James chuckles, "No, the kids are fine. Do you want us to drive you home? I'm worried about you driving while upset."

I laugh at that. "We'll be fine, thank you though." I lean forward and kiss each of them, then head for the bathroom to wash my face and gather up our stuff.

"Charley sweetie, let's go!" I call out of the room. Charley runs up from one of the bedrooms.

"We go home?" His eyes are bright.

"Yes sweetie." I bend down to pick him up, "Did you have a fun time with the girls?" I ask.

"We had fun." Amelia says dismissively, "But now it's skiing time," she cheers.

I give them all hugs and say goodbye. My three men wait at the door. I blush as they each watch me hungrily. "Bye dad." Charley is the first to say, addressing all three of them.

I feel my entire face turn beet red; did he seriously say that? The chuckles around the room break up the silence, I still feel like puking or passing out. I give them each a quick kiss goodbye, telling them all I'll see them tomorrow.

Since they got us new clothes, I'm not doing the walk of shame home. But it's still pretty embarrassing for the staff to see us on a Sunday. Even rushing through to our car, I spot at least two staff members who might be petty enough to report me. I hope not, goodness that would be so embarrassing.

Charley goes on and on about swimming, I'm glad he had so much fun. Now that we have suits, I guess I'll have to take him to swim more often. "What should we do when we get home?" I ask him.

"I want play." He absentmindedly draws in the condensation of the windows.

"That's fine you can play. I think I'll make some more soap today." He ignores me, but what do I expect out of a two-year-old? So, I turn on the radio, at least some noise will be nice.

After being surrounded by so much energy and excitement with the guys, being home feels too quiet. I turn on the t.v. putting in Ferngully just to have some noise while I get ready. I want to be with them, I really do. How would that even work? We have such different lives. My life is here in the mountains and wilderness. Theirs is in the city. I certainly won't move to the city, and I would never ask them to leave their lives either. Despite them saying they want me, I just don't see a way for it to be possible.

I want to cry, but really what's the use in that either? No, we had a wonderful time, I just have to cherish these memories forever. I feel like I'm acting like a stereotypical woman who can't make up her mind. Seriously, I've been through complete happiness, horror, happiness and sad acceptance all in one day. I just need a mental break.

I shake myself out and decide what my next batch of soap will be. Maybe I will start my own company, how awesome would that be, making my own hours. Instead of making one batch, I make five batches before I'm out of oils and lye. Feeling proud of the process, I clean everything up and start making dinner for Charley and I.