Who Will Love Me Now? (Danisnotonfire & amazingphil & crabstickz & kickthepj)

Chapter 13 - Was It All Just A Lie?

I just stood there, not knowing what do to or say. Seeing them step up our stairs and not even glancing back to see the state they had left me in. Dan took the note and scrupled it up, ripped it till each piece was the size of a snowflake and chucked it across the room making a blizzard of paper scattering across the rug. Each scrap of paper slowly floated down as Dan ran out the door, rage ran all the way through his veins to his face. I'd never seen my baby this angry. Why does my mind have to make decisions..try find out whats caused this by trying to sticking each tiny bit back together or run after the guy I've loved for so long.

Few thoughts ran through my head. Mum was still standing watching like it was movie. This wasn't a movie, this was my life, her own daughters life that she had help ruin. Her face looked almost like this was exciting her, what on earth was her mind doing inside to make her think this is exciting? Someone remind me how I'm related to this freak of a human who doesn't seem to own a heart or mind, let alone a normal one. Peering round the door I saw Dan running, quicker and quicker. Never once did Dan leave me when I ran, well this is my chance to show him I won't ever leave him and bonus my mum can't follow, healed boots aren't exactly the best thing to run over mud and through forests in. One last glance at the note before I ran straight out the door, full pace.

I didn't even bother turning round, she wouldn't be following and if she did start she would have given up, abandoned me just like every other time. "Dan! Stop! Please!" I screamed over and over again. Nothing was going to stop him, nothing. I watched seeing my boy just about to run out of sight into the blackness we call the forest near our house. I couldn't car any less about the fact I was aching and hurting, including the fact I was still weak from what had happened earlier. No matter how much more I wanted to run I couldn't, I shouted and shouted, I was too weak. Seeing him carry on running not once looking back hurt me so bad, I tried shouting once more but I knew inside it wasn't going to make any difference.

Less than a few steps away from the forest, I watched, my heart sinking, he stopped. Surely my eyes were playing tricks on me? Maybe it was my mind trying to fool me once more. I was too weak to do or say anything apart from stare into his perfect eyes, those big deep brown eyes perfect eyes, his head shook looking at me. I'm sorry. That's all he mouthed looking at me. Sharply he turned back to face the darkness once more and without another thought his legs started again, running, not thinking about me no more.

What could I honestly do? Me? Lily? Who was I to stop him..I put myself together, thinking about everything he told me. How could a note change all of those promises, those feelings? Was it all just a lie? Dragging myself back to the house wondering if I'd be excepted back in there, I didn't own nothing. Dan payed, he payed for it all. I still remember he wouldn't let me pay till we had our own house and even then I'd only get a part time, he didn't want his baby girl tired..well, his ex-baby girl. That's what it feels like at this second in time and space. Staring at the stars wondering how each angel got up there, I loved doing it, made me think of my life down here.

Carried on dragging myself, one foot before the other, wondering how long it was going to take me to reach the place I used to call home, the place I still wanted to call home but I'll just have to find out if it still was going to be.I clutched my freezing body parts close even though my hands were about to drop off from the clod wind blasting against me. Some how I knew the second I stepped into that house I wasn't going to be welcome, not at all, not ever. Never will that hope be there, one wish..get the note and leave, leave quick and go far. Dan didn't look back and neither will I.

There wasn't a clock in sight but by the night sky it was pretty clear it was late, I was just hoping everyone had gone to bed and that the guys had been as kind to my mum as they had when they first excepted me into their group. Lights started to catch my gaze as I came closer and closer. That's when I realised what was going on, I saw the lights of doors opening and closing, our neighbours saw me coming and started getting scared, rushing to their windows and doors, slamming them shut as if I was going to kill them. My home? No, this wasn't my home anymore. I walked up to my boxes, my belongings everything just sat there, everything I owned was sitting in front of me in cardboard boxes.