Alien On This Earth

Eternity (I Just Want All Time to Stop)

Title from Bang Chan's new song Eternity. It's about Berry and honestly, it might be my favorite of his songs. It's so cute. If you haven't heard it, go listen. It's my new comfort song. 

Brief mention of suicide but for literally two seconds. And then there's just the usual trigger warnings that this story contains. 

Sorry about not updating this in so long - hope you enjoy!

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Han came to on someone's back. There were bright lights all around him and the sound of people talking, but he wasn't really aware of what was happening. All he knew was that he had screwed up and let himself bother the members. He was being a nuisance. They were at practice, right? And then he had to go get sick and... then what? He had been talking to Felix, what happened after that? 

"Han Jisung? Can you hear me?" Someone called, lifting his barely opened eyes and poking daggers into them. Well, it was actually just a light, but it felt like a dagger. 

"Stop." He whispered, tightening his arms around whoever was holding him. He was pretty sure he was suffocating them but if he let go, he was certain he would fall into the black pit that was slowly swallowing him up. When did he feel so sick? What happened? Where was he? 

"I'll lead you to an examination room." Someone said and the light was pulled out of his eyes and the person carrying him moved. He gripped tighter, really hoping he wouldn't fall off, but whoever was holding him held tighter. 

Time passed in a blur. He barely remembered what the nurse said to him, the only thing he really did remember was getting an IV and then a doctor arriving. He couldn't really focus on what they were saying, he was busy gripping onto someone's hand - it was a tiny hand. But the words "eating disorder" were pretty obvious to him. 

He felt like laughing. He definitely didn't have an eating disorder. He barely lost any weight. He was still fat. He definitely didn't have an eating disorder. 

"If you cannot get him to eat, we may have to consider admitting him to the psych ward." Those words got the fog in Han's head to evaporate, and he was wide awake. 

The voice in his mind was screaming at him to not let that happen. To get out. They didn't know what was going on. He barely knew what was going on. He tried to rip his hand out of the tiny hand holding his, but they held him tighter, and he didn't have the strength to fight it. What was happening? Why was he so weak? Had he gone too far? Would they know about the cuts on his legs? If the hospital found out, would they let him go? 

"Hannie, it's okay." Felix's soothing voice whispered, and Han realized the hand in his belonged to his twin. 

"No. No." Han shook his head rapidly. "I don't have an eating disorder." 

"Hannie." Felix tried but Minho cut him off. 

"He's right." He blurted, attracting all eyes to him. "Hannie is right - he doesn't have an eating disorder. It's not him. It's the company. They forced this really intense diet on him, and he's just been doing what they say. We'll talk to them about it though, I promise. He doesn't have an eating disorder." 

Chan raised an eyebrow and shot the second oldest a look that said "I hope you're doing the right thing" before he looked back at the doctor. "Minho's right. I've already been talking to the company about changing his diet." 

"Well, that's good then. You need to change it quickly. And we want to get a lot of calories in him before you leave. He can stay for the day and eat every meal we give him, or we can put the calories directly into his stomach."