ℝ𝕠𝕤𝕖 𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕕 𝕘𝕝𝕒𝕤𝕤𝕖𝕤 ・||・ E. Kirishima

♡*𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕥𝕨𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕪: 𝕝𝕚𝕗𝕖'𝕤 𝕟𝕠𝕥 𝕗𝕒𝕚𝕣*♡

⚠️𝕋𝕣𝕚𝕘𝕘𝕖𝕣 𝕨𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘(𝕤)⚠️:

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

"Sir please, I'm already behind everyone else by a mile. I know I'm not that good or that strong but you have to give me a chance." today in class we found out about the hero internships we're going to be doing soon and while Mr Aizawa was helping me after class he let me know I won't be doing one. "L/n I know you want to catch up to your class and I was going to let you go when I thought you were only having problems with your liver but now you have cancer on top of that it would be irresponsible for me to let you go out on your own. Your already having problems with your ocd how are you going to be in a whole different city with people you've never met before. Are you going to be able to deal with all of that by yourself." I get what Mr Aizawa is saying but it still doesn't feel fair. "I've started my medication for my ocd and I think I've been getting better. I only had to wipe over the desk once this morning instead of three deep cleans. The doctor said I'm okay to keep training if I'm monitored." telling him all of this is really hard, it's making me anxious. "That's all amazing and I can see your really trying to get better but i can see how nervous you are. Your shaking and stumbling on your words. If your having a hard time talking to me will you be able to tell strangers when something is wrong. Besides you have your first chemo session days before the internships, your body needs to recover. You need to just skip this one." I'm upset but I don't want to argue incase I make him mad.

"L/n I don't want to keep you here but as your teacher I have to make sure your going to be safe. These internships will happen again and you should be able to join in next time." if he's trying to make me feel better he's not doing a good job. "I'll be dead by the next internship." I don't know why I'm bothering to do chemo. I'm going to die anyways. "you won't be dead so don't say that. You just need to try being more positive. You know everyone is trying their best to help you get better." , "Of course I know that but you try being positive with cancer and liver disease." being positive is to much work when the world seems to hate me. "You know this year I met another student, older than you but still in the hero course, and he has cancer as well but he's a lot more positive about life." , "yeah and I bet that kid gets to do everything in the hero course with all of the friends that he probably has. I don't want to be positive, life just sucks and I've accepted that." sounds sad to admit defeat this quickly, actually it doesn't just sound sad it is sad but what good is positivity really going to bring me right now. "Hey I never told you, you couldn't have any friends. Actually why don't you have any friends?" , "because, what if these people that I think are trying to be my friends are actually just people trying to hurt me or worse they want to trick me into doing something bad or make me commit a crime I didn't know I was committing so they can have me arrested. What if I've already committed a crime and the police are coming for me. I don't like the police." I started looking around the room, scared some police officer was going to jump out of any corner.

"L/n I'm going to be honest, you sound insane. I really think that people are trying to he friends with you because they like you and not because their plotting anything evil. Also your the most cautious kid I've ever met so I doubt your accidently committing any crimes. You need to take all these walls down and start relaxing a bit." I know he's probably right and not everyone I know is praying on my down fall but my brain doesn't stop telling me these things just even though I know there irrational. "I can't do that. I can't relax or be calm. I'm just not like my class and I'm okay with that. I thought about it and I'm happy being alone. Nobody understands me better than myself so my own company is the best." Am I really okay with that, maybe. It's hard accepting the truth that I'm not a normal person but lying doesn't make things easier. It all kinda settled in when I freaked out in Kirishima's house and ran out shoeless. "You don't look happy. If you don't have very long left you should spend that time surrounded by people who care about you. How is your class meant to understand you if you don't tell them what's going on." Mr Aizawa is trying really hard and I appreciate that but I wish everyone would let me do things how I need to do them. "No, that's selfish. They all have so much going on at school and probably stuff going on at home too. They don't need my problems on top of that." I don't understand why he even cares so much. The quieter I am the less he has to yell. "I know you have your doubts but I think they'd do a pretty good job handling your situation." , "I don't doubt that my class would be great friends, well maybe with the exception of Bakugo but I'm more worried about me. With the way I was raised I'd be a pretty bad friend." I grabbed my bag and stood up from the chair I had pushed up against my teachers desk. "Thanks for talking sir." I walked out the class room in search of Sekiguchi's car so I could finally go home.

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»
𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥: 𝟙𝟘𝟘𝟘

Some one comment or I'm gonna stop uploading. That's not a threat that's a promise.

𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝟚𝟘 𝕞𝕒𝕕𝕖 𝕓𝕪 𝕔𝕝𝕒𝕦𝕕𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕖