The lost

Chapter 8

I fall onto some bushes; my knees get dirty from dirt and my skin is burning from the fall. I look over to the shadow, that was hiding behind the trees, in the forest. I see it. I put myself together, and look up again... it's gone...

I hear doors opening, and I see a flashlight coming closer and closer. I start running towards the forest.

I don't care about these branches... I don't care if I get hurt while doing this, I. Need. To. Escape. I am still holding the stuffed animal and I still have my bag full of stuff that I need. But my bag gets stuck on one of the branches and I am unable to take it off, while not taking it off me. I look back and see the flashlights coming closer and closer... I take of the bag, full of panic. And start running, I only have my stuffed bunny... nothing more, no water... no food... I try not to overthink; this is survival right now... It's between life or death.

Before I knew it someone dragged me down into some bushes, I full of panic start crying. The person is holding their hand on my mouth. I see the people going past us. Tears still running down my face. I look back at who saved me (I guess??) and I was full of surprise, I quickly hugged him. I hugged Victor.

He with a gentle smile tries comforting me. I while sobbing start asking him a lot of questions quietly like:

"I thought you were dead"

"How did you survive?"

"How long were you here?"

"I can't fucking believe it; I seriously thought you were dead"

"Wait... are you going to hurt me or something?"

Victor overwhelmed by all the questions says: "Calm down, Ash. Let's just go out of here... Then I'll explain, alright?", I nod, and we leave the bushes walking away from the people that ran past us. I quickly stop and ask quietly: "Can... we like... get my bag?".

Victor shakes his head and says: "That'll take too much time, and I have food and water already", I nod yet again and start hugging my stuffed bunny more and more.

I can't believe this... I am walking behind someone... who I thought was dead for... 4 years?! No wonder I couldn't find his "goodbye" letter... He never died... He never... I don't know... I could swear though that he did in fact... do the "tradition". We all saw his body... bloody, it wasn't a nice site to see... But still I thought he was dead... we all did... I start walking beside him, following his paste. And quietly ask:

"I thought you followed the damn tradition... what happened?"

Victor suddenly stops and says: "Follow me up the tree, that's where we can stay for the night". I climb behind him, following his steps, and sit beside him, on a different branch. Before I could ask the same thing, he answers (finally): "Honestly, I thought I did too... You know die? I honestly didn't even want to write a goodbye letter like everyone else. I just wanted to be done, and left alone...", He sighs and looks up at the starry night:

"I of course followed through, even though... I knew there was an escape. But like she had said to you before... I was one of those: "Lost ones". The lost people unable to find a way out of the hell... The hell that is supposed to be our... home", he quickly pauses and looks over to me: "After the attempt... Mrs. Smith took me outside and lead me to the forest. I knew... I thought... I was done. Dead. But I saw not short after lights... not death... but people..."

"People?!", Victor smiles and nods: "It surprised me too, believe me... They fixed me up, bandaged my arms, to prevent bleeding out and honestly... back then, I mean 4 years ago... I just wanted to be done. No help, no rescue, just death"

"Why did you want that?", I ask quietly.

"People want to exit, because... they don't know how to escape the pain. They just want the unbearable pain to stop. They just want everything to stop. It isn't because they think: "Oh, that's cool" ... It's because there is just a constant fight in our minds, between life or death, which seems like it never stops, which encourages people to finally do the last step and exit" I was silent by that response and nodded...

"Continuing with my story... they helped me like I said. That's where we are heading. To check you for any injuries. Anyway, these past years, I finally just found a peace... Instead of running from the hell that I had in my mind. I finally accepted it and started fighting against the urge of ending it all, and that's my story, I wonder what yours will be..." Victor looked up to the sky once more and closed his eyes. Breathing calmly and continuing with a bit of a laughter: "I probably sound so old, even though I'm not, I'm like 22 years old, I still have my story to tell. So don't feel pressure to creature your own story, it takes time, right?"

I, with a big smile nod and say: "Right".