An Old Friend

Chapter 4

All I could think about was his words, the tone in his voice. Everything would change now. I knew his secret. He knew mine. There's only one more secret that he didn't know about: my feelings for him.

It turns out my dad was cool with me getting home a little late when I told him that my English teacher asked me to help her out with grading papers.
What's another lie?

I went to my room to dwell on the day.
His hair, his eyes, his lips, his nose, his smile... Wait. I haven't seen him smile yet.
I doubted that I'd see Billie smiling that often anymore. His dad was his rock. Just like my mom was to me. I always liked Billie Joe's dad, he was always so full of life. It's hard to think of him dead.
"Rest in peace Mr. Armstrong," I said as I stared at the ceiling in my room.

I eventually fell asleep on my bed around 10:30. I hadn't come down for dinner all night, but my dad didn't care. He knew if I was hungry, I would come.

October 7th, 1988

I woke up at 7:30. Perfect. Enough time to put in my contacts and do my hair. As I got up to brush my teeth, I realized something.

I didn't have the nightmare.

I DIDN'T HAVE THE FREAKIN NIGHTMARE!
I was so relieved. I wasn't gonna have to go to the doctor! I guess Billie really took my mind of things.

I was off to school when I stopped by Billie's old house, a couple down from mine. It looked so sad. So lifeless. Like our parents when they passed away...

I found myself crying as I stood there on the sidewalk. I sat down. I didn't care if I was late for school. One tardy is not the end of the world. As I was drying off my eyes, I saw Billie Joe walking straight for me.
Oh crap! Now he's running.
As he reached me he said out of breath, "Lizzie what's wrong? And what are you doing in front of my house?"

"Oh nothing, I was just thinking about the old times and- wait. Did you just say this was your house? You mean your old house right?"

"Um, well no. We just moved back remember Liz? The house was still vacant so we bought it back."

"What? But it looks empty."

"That's exactly the point. We haven't had time to unpack yet. I mean, we're sleeping on air matresses!" he laughed. And there it was: his smile. It was so different now. He had slightly crooked teeth, but I didn't care, I thought it gave him some character.

"Is that what it takes for people to smile?"

"What do you mean, Liz?"

"I mean that I haven't smiled in years. Sure, I have tried, but I haven't genuinely smile since my mom-"

"Stop Lizzie, don't cry. You should have plenty to be happy about, and y'know you always have me," he smiled again.

That's right, Billie. I have you. All I need is you.

If only I could say it to his face. But I couldn't, so I just nodded.

"C'mon, lets get you to school," Billie said. And he helped me up by grabbing my hands with his, and pulling me up towards him. And just like that our faces were inches away from each other. We stared into each other's eyes for a second, and then he broke away and started walking.

I picked up my backpack off the sidewalk and we were on our way to hell, or school.