Charlie's Web

Charlie

It'd been seven agonizingly slow days since Rick had brought me to the hell hole that I now call home. As each day passed, my hope of escape faded further into oblivion. I was never left alone. Even in the bathroom, as soon as I walked out he would be standing at the door, waiting for me, watching me with those beady eyes of his. There wasn't a single moment where I couldn't feel his gaze on me. Every morning he would come in and wake me up with his lips stretched into a wide grin. Breakfast would be mostly silent, and although he often tried to start a conversation, it never went anywhere. I was really trying to put on a show, to make it seem like I was warming up to him, but it was so hard. Talking to him was... God, there were so many words to describe it. Painful, off-putting, downright aggravating. Every time I opened my mouth to speak his eyes would light up with excitement. He was like an overbearing parent, always asking me pointless questions.

"What are you thinking?"

"Are you okay?"

"Can I do anything for you?"

"What do you want for dinner?"

"What movie should we watch?"

"Do you like it here?"

"Can I come to bed with you now?"

I made sure to keep my replies short and sweet, hoping that he would take the hint and leave me alone. Unfortunately, he would often continue, telling me how beautiful I was, or saying how lucky he was to be with me. I wouldn't consider us "being" with each other. I had no way out, so there was no other option.

He was still strict with rules as well. I was under constant supervision, but that wasn't even the worst part.

He'd become much more daring. Most days he would sneak up behind me and grab my waist, his strong arms crushing me to his body. I would stand frozen against him, desperately trying to keep the tears from spilling. We would stay like that for what felt like hours, he always went straight for my hair, wasting no time before burying his nose in the strands and taking a strong whiff. Then, he would carry me to the couch and sit me on his lap, forcing me to feel the front of his pants grow against my lower region. Even though we were both clothed, it still left me feeling ashamed and violated, like thousands of bugs were crawling over my skin.

Inevitably, I cried every time it happened, prompting him to go straight into panic mode.

"No, no no no. Don't cry, sweetie. Please, don't cry," he would beg, practically throwing me off of him and getting to his knees in front of me. He would hold both of my hands in his, his dark eyes pleading for forgiveness.

He hated it when I cried. It somehow made him even more clingy, which I didn't think was possible, so I tried my best not to when in front of him. The only place that heard my endless sobs were the shower walls.

It was so unbearably draining, hiding my emotions like that. Waiting for my daily shower to unleash the suffering I felt inside. He probably wondered why I spent so much time in the bathroom. It was my safe haven, the only place that put some distance between us, it was a small thing, but I was eternally grateful to have it all to myself.

We were sitting next to each other on the loveseat. I was trying to read a book, though it was very distracting knowing that Rick was right there breathing down my neck. As usual, I could feel his eyes on me, watching intently as I turned each page. There was quiet music in the background, whenever he saw me reading he'd change the record player to classical and lower the volume. It helped my focus, but I still never got much reading done. It was hard to get my brain to do anything these days, all it wanted to do was analyze and dissect my past, which left me feeling even worse.

It was an absolutely crazy thing to say, but I even missed Vivian. I missed our arguments, our banter, our good moments that were rare but so wonderful. I missed Jesse and Ben and Caroline and that random guy who'd always let me copy his notes in science. I missed all of it. Normally, I had something to numb the emotional pain; alcohol, cigs, drugs. Now it was all gone, ripped away from me when I needed it the most. I had to deal with a complete psychopath daily, and I wasn't even allowed to have a drink. This truly was hell.

"Charlie," Rick's voice broke me out of my thoughts. I jutted my chin out and raised a brow at him. "Would you like to go outside?"

The question nearly brought tears to my eyes. Was my civility finally getting me somewhere? Was this his way of showing me I'd gained his trust? Suddenly, my mind was going a thousand miles a minute. If I continued to play nice, who knew what other privileges I could earn? This was my ticket out of here!

"Really? Oh, that would be amazing, Ricky. Thank you." I surprised both of us as I jumped forward and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight embrace. My plan was working. If I acted like his dutiful little girlfriend, he would let his guard down, hopefully enough to keep that knife drawer unlocked. His body froze for a moment as I held him, until I felt his strong arms around me, pulling me even closer to him.

I'm going to get out.

I'm going to get out.

I'm going to get out.

"Slow down, sweetheart," he pushed at my chest to see my expression. "I do have one condition," he said, that shit-eating grin returning to his svelte face once again.

Oh, god. What did he want from me? A sexual favor? I swallowed the bile that had crept up my throat.

"I'm going to start sleeping with you, okay?" His dark eyes lit up in excitement.

I should've known his offer was too good to be true. My stomach felt queasy at the thought of being forced to share a bed with him every night. On the other hand, going outside was a way out of the house. If he continued to let me out, I could run away. He started to speak before I had the chance to answer.

"It's going to happen eventually either way." His expression fell, turning stern as his eyes searched mine. "I know that you want to take things slow, but we're together now, and this is going to be the next step."

It suddenly felt much harder to keep my breathing steady. Each breath that entered my lungs seemed useless, as though my body had forgotten how to absorb the oxygen it so desperately needed. There was no winning. If I said no I would be trapped in this stale fucking house all day, but if I said yes... Who knew what would happen? I tried to imagine it, sleeping next to him every night, being cuddled to his body against my will. The mental picture made my whole body shudder in fear. It was the last thing that I wanted, but what other choice did I have?

I was unaware of how much I would deeply regret asking the question that fell from my lips.

"J-just sleeping? Nothing else, right?" My fingers clutched tightly at the fabric of his shirt, each second felt like a lifetime as I waited for his response.

"Charlie," Rick chuckled, his arm rose, cupping my cheek in his large hand. "Is that what you're so worried about? I promise, when the time comes, I'll be gentle," that sickening look of his returned, causing my heart to stop. No. No. He put his hands on either side of my head, pulling my ear to his mouth. "Trust me, I know how to make you feel good," his voice was light and breathy in my ear, causing me to shake.

No, no. This was all wrong.

I could no longer wait to think of an intricate escape plan, I needed to leave today. There was no other option.

"O-okay," I said, trying unsuccessfully to keep my voice steady.