My Healing Forever

CHAPTER 3

As soon as she left, my heart began to race uncontrollably.

Realizing my pills were empty, I remembered the inhaler the girl had given me, and I quickly retrieved it from my pocket. As I took a puff, I felt a wave of relief wash over me. Despite still feeling dizzy, the inhaler helped ease my breathing considerably.

Last night had been a total nightmare. Unable to sleep, I had been plagued by breakdowns, struggling to contain my emotions in front of my roommates. I had sought solace in the bathroom, spending hours crying in solitude. The lack of sleep left me feeling drained, and I feared this would become a recurring pattern.

Dr. Young-sun, my psychiatrist, had already offered to withdraw me from the program if my health deteriorated. Part of me longed to take her up on that offer, to return to the familiarity of my work at the hospital. But another part of me was determined to prove that my disorder wouldn't hold me back.

I had to be strong, to push through the challenges ahead. "Be strong, Irene," I reminded myself, steeling my resolve.

Returning to reality, I couldn't shake the thoughts of the girl with the bangs from my mind. There was something about her that stirred up conflicting emotions within me. But I pushed those thoughts aside, focusing instead on the tasks at hand.

Stepping out of the bathroom, I prepared myself to face the day ahead, ready to fulfill my duties as a nurse for the trainees. Today was a new day, and I was determined to make the most of it.

---

We finished our breakfast and headed to our assigned post. Nayeon, Wendy, whom I had just met, and I were stationed on the side of the trainees, ready to assist anyone who might become dehydrated or need immediate attention.

Sitting under the scorching sun, we watched as the male trainees performed their exercises with determination. Nayeon couldn't help but peek, her eyes are moving as she is looking for someone.

"Where are the female trainees?" she wondered aloud.

"Why are you searching for them when you have this eye candy right in front of you?" Wendy teased, her gaze fixed on the male sweating trainees.

"Men? No thanks, I'm gay. I prefer women," Nayeon replied casually.

"Really? Well, I'm attracted to both men and women too, but I don't label my sexuality," Wendy shared.

I listened quietly to their conversation. Sexual orientation wasn't a topic that bothered me; in fact, one of my friends back at the hospital, Lee hyun was gay and I'm happy he's finally out to his family.

"How about you Irene, are you in a relationship right now?" Wendy's curiosity bubbled over.

"I'm straight, and I think a relationship is not for me. And, to tell you, I'm totally okay with you being queer," I answered honestly, trying to keep the conversation light.

"That's good then. You should at least look for a guy like those abs guys to have a crush on, you know," Nayeon suggested with a smile.

Suddenly, the image of the girl with bangs popped into my head. Why was she suddenly on my mind?

As soon as she left, my heart began to race uncontrollably.

Realizing my pills were empty, I remembered the inhaler the girl had given me, and I quickly retrieved it from my pocket. As I took a puff, I felt a wave of relief wash over me. Despite still feeling dizzy, the inhaler helped ease my breathing considerably.

Last night had been a total nightmare. Unable to sleep, I had been plagued by breakdowns, struggling to contain my emotions in front of my roommates. I had sought solace in the bathroom, spending hours crying in solitude. The lack of sleep left me feeling drained, and I feared this would become a recurring pattern.