Shassie oneshots, i guess

Give Shawn the Dress, Dammit!

Summary: Basically the same as the episode Weekend Warriors except Shawn gets to wear the nurse's outfit, plus a little shassie at the end. Oh, and a couple mentions of trans!shawn.

Notes: I have no idea how the fuck a dress from the civil war is made, specifically one with hoops. I don't know the structure. So give me some leniency here if I wrote the dress wrong.

Word Count: 2,417

—————

Juliet left the car and trotted over to where Shawn and Gus were standing, one of whom was holding a dress. "Hey, what's up guys?"

"Jules!" Shawn and Gus ran up to her. "You're going to get a call from a very irate Sally Reynolds saying two guys just drove by and stole her dress. Just ignore it, okay?"

She was extra confused now. "What the hell are you guys doing?"

Gus started explaining. "Sally was a target. Shawn's gonna put on that dress, and wait for someone to shoot him."

Shawn nodded along. "Yeah but- the plan sounds a lot better when you don't say it like that."

"What?"

"Listen, detective." Shawn turned back to Juliet. "We have reason to believe that the intended target was Sally Reynolds. Now we've stolen her dress," he held up said dress, "we're gonna catch the yellow-bellied son-of-a-bitch red handed." He paused to take a breath. "I forced the ending, that's horrible."

"So, risking getting shot is the only way to solve the case?"

"Absolutely."

"Then we should stop the battle!"

"No, we can't. It's too late. They're gonna start in less than a minute. Listen, Juliet...please let us go?" They're both bouncing on the balls of their feet in anticipation.

Juliet doesn't say anything, mulling over her choices in her head.

After a minute or two of tense silence, she wordlessly marched to the back door of the car she came in and opened it, rummaging around for something. When she resurfaced she had a bullet proof vest. "If you're going out there, you might as well be protected."

———

"Breathe out, loosen up."

"Ow ow ow ow!"

"Sorry Shawn!"

"No no, it's fine, this wasn't exactly made to fit me. Now just zip- AGH!"

"Sorry!"

"Is it done yet? Please tell me it's done."

"You're all good." Juliet patted the zipper on his back.

Shawn straightened up, and tried to take a breath. It was difficult, and it made him feel like he was back in high school, wearing his binder. It wasn't a terrible thing to remember. But it wasn't exactly a fond memory either.

"Here." Juliet handed him a helmet. He shoved the it on, fumbling a bit with the buckle.

Gus grabbed Shawn by the shoulders. "Alright remember, the fifth cannon boom is your cue to shoot whoever's playing Quantrill."

"Right." Shawn nodded, but then gave his friend a strange look. "Wait, how do you know that?"

"I read the manual. Didn't you?"

"I didn't open the manual, it was like War and Peace. There were seventeen chapters."

"It's the manual, Shawn."