Helluva boss pilot

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[The scene opens with a shot of Imp City that slowly zooms in on the I.M.P building. The sound of the busy streets can be heard in the background. The scene transitions to a closed door labeled "IMP Headquarters", with a crude sign made from a sheet of notebook paper that reads, "Meeting in progress" with a smiley face drawn next to it. The light flickers as the camera zooms in on the door. Inside, Blitza is walking in front a whiteboard on the wall as she lectures her employees.]

Blitza: Alright. Now, I know business has been... a bit slow lately, yes. It's no one's fault, okay? I'm not naming any names here... *looks at Moxxie* Moxxie.

[Moxxie gives her an incredulous look in response.]

Blitza: Now, does anyone have... any bright ideas on how we can get business drummin' up again?

Millie: *eyes sparkling* What about a car wash?

Jack: sorry mills this is hell no cares if there cars are clean.

Blitza: he's right Millie. *thinks for a second* Wh- Ooh! What about a billboard?

[she waves her hands with an enthusiastic flair as sparkles fly out.]

Moxxie: *rolls eyes* We can't afford a billboard, ma'am.

Blitza: *wraps her arm over Moxxie's shoulder* Helpful, Moxxie. Really glad you're in the room right now. *pushes Moxxie away* Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?

[Blitza turns on a TV that shows the I.M.P. crew brutally murdering people from the overworld as they are paid to do. Blitza whacks a man in the face with a mallet, Moxxie is blown away firing a shotgun through the mouth of a man tied to a chair, Loona swings a man back and forth in her mouth, Jack uses soul robber to slam someone into the ground and Millie decapitates someone with a harpoon and laughs. Then, it zooms out to everyone watching the TV, with Loona, Millie, Jack, and Blitza eating popcorn.]

Blitza: Ahh, those were the good times.

Moxxie: I don't need any reminding, ma'am. Considering you blew most of our salaries on an obnoxious TV ad last week. One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours on a channel... nobody watches.

Jack: Wait what?

Blitza: Uh, hey. Excuse me? What's "obnoxious" about a super-fun jingle, alright? It's a fun distraction when an advertisement's spittin' bullshit!

Millie: People love musicals, ma'am.

Blitza: Exactly, Millie! And we're basically doin' a musical. *does jazz hands* Are you gonna crush my musical theatre dreams like my dad did?

Moxxie: Ma'am--

Blitza: 'Cause, right now? All I see is just my dad's asshole talking to me! Crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside.

Millie: Are you tryin' to crush her dreams, Moxxie?

Moxxie: I-- What?

Millie: *flirtatiously* I thought I knew you.

[She playfully sticks her tongue out at him as Moxxie blushes and rolls her eyes affectionately.]

Jack: you two look cute together.

Millie/moxxie: (be better with you hot stuff)

Blitza: I can't believe you, Moxxie!

[She tearfully holds up an employee of the month plaque with Moxxie's picture on it.]

Blitza: After I made you employee of the month!

[Jack tries to stifle his laughter]

Moxxie: *defeated* Okay, ma'am! I'm sorry; a commercial jingle is not comparable to musical theatre. Nobody actually likes the jingles!

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