Shadows

Five

Leaving Prince with Andre and Matt at the apartment was letting me have my alone time. Although I loved my husband, it was hard for me to get out and just do things that I wanted to do. There was a library across the street from the grocery store and was in walking distance. There, I was studying for my exams and doing any research on DID that I could. Prince knew what time to pick me up every day I went because he didn't like me walking home alone. Although things were chaotic just a few weeks ago, they were getting better as he was spending time with old friends. Today after I did my homework and studied some for an algebra test. Why on earth I needed algebra for psychology was a mystery, but I found a book on Prince's disorder called "The Mind and the Parts". Right as I was checking it out, I felt a hand on my lower back and knew it was Prince. "Hey." I whispered slipping the book into my backpack before we left the library. It was cold at night here and Prince gave me his white trench coat.

"You still got smoke coming out of your ears from concentrating so hard." He said. It made me giggle and take his hand as we were walking. He was being super affectionate this evening which I appreciated as with school and studying, I didn't really want to be bothered with affection. "What'd you learn today?" "Oh, I had Social Science today so I was actually learning psychology. Then I had algebra which I hated. Like, why do I need algebra? Someone is going to tell me they have BPD and I have to solve the square root of whatever the fuck." He laughed. We walked past a house with dogs barking behind the fence and I knew that we were almost home. "Andre and Matt went out for a little while, so we can have dinner together. It's already in the oven. Then after dinner we can start gaze or something." Prince was being incredibly romantic right now. "What's on the menu?" I asked him. "Honestly...Baked mac n cheese. I tried to cook something else but I burnt it. Not badly, but you might smell it when we walk in." I could see our apartment building and was walking up the stairs with him. Prince unlocked the door and I couldn't definitely smell something burnt. "You see...I was going to make some Alfredo but I forgot about the noodles in the pot and all of the water evaporated."

I put my backpack down and kicked off my shoes before Prince stepped into the kitchen. "When will Andre and Matt be back?" "Ah, shit." I turned my hand and Prince was holding his hand and his palm was red like he had burned himself. "Prince, Oh my God are you okay?" I stood quickly and walked over to him. "Prince, are you okay?" He looked at me and looked around before letting go of his hand. "Ah shit who the fuck makes Mac n cheese for a meal?" It was Jamie fronting now. "Hey, I think it's a great meal." I said crossing my arms. It had been awhile since Jamie fronted and he was probably the alter I was the most familiar with by now. Jamie shook the hand that Prince burnt, but he wasn't feeling the pain. "Let me wrap that hand up for you." I said to Jamie. He was about to reach out for the pan with his bare hands but I grabbed his wrists. "Jamie...go sit down." I said to him. I knew if I talked to him in a certain way he would listen. It was amazing how much he had grown in the time I had known him. I put oven mittens on before moving the baked mac n cheese to the table. I took them off and went into our bathroom to grab some bandaging. I often forgot that Jamie couldn't feel physical pain. He didn't understand the repercussions of what happened when you touched something hot. I came back and sat next to him before gently lathering his hand. "How'd that happen?" Jamie asked. "Prince got burned. That's why you're here." I said softly. Jamie was staring at me and he leaned in to smell my hair. "New shampoo." He said. "Mmhmm." "I miss the old one." He said. I sighed and started wrapping his hand.

"You know, you ain't gotta baby me. I'm grown." I laughed. "But this is Prince's hand too, remember?" Jamie shook his head. When his hand was okay, I stood to go to the table and make myself a bowl of food before sitting on the couch next to him. I put my legs in his lap and he was almost holding me. He stroked my thigh. Usually Jamie talked his head off, but he wasn't right now. He wasn't even getting up to make himself a drink. "How is everyone?" I asked him. "They're fine." His voice cracked a little. "Camille? How is she?" "Spoiling Joey. Well, in her own way she's spoiling him. You know, speaking of kids and all...when you and Prince having another one?" I dropped my spoon into the bowl. "I don't know, Jamie. I don't know if I want to. He wants to...but I don't know. I'm going to stay on the pill until I know for sure. I don't even know how'd I bring that up to my family." "Fuck them, baby doll. They ain't did SHIT for us and you know it. You have a baby when you're ready. Or...I guess when we're ready. Not like, me and you. That'll be a big disaster." I giggled. "We all raised Dominic and that wasn't a disaster." Jamie smiled and pulled me closer. "I do miss that little shit. He was my little buddy. Well, I guess our little buddy. Meaning-" "I know what you mean, Jamie. You know, I'm so proud of you." He turned his head towards me slightly. "Why? I don't do anything for any motherfucker. I don't help anything at all with nothing." I finished my bowl of mac n cheese and stood to step out for a cigarette. "Don't tell Prince I'm smoking again. Well, I guess you won't." Jamie followed me downstairs and I was holding a pack and my lighter.