Shadows

Four

After the long journey to New York, we finally made it and Divinity and I were working together to find a place. We were going to put a down payment on an apartment, but the landlord was shocked and happy that we bought the apartment outright. It was a pretty good one, too. One bedroom one bathroom for the both of us. Divinity was adjusting well to the moving and I think I was, too. But who wasn't adjusting was everyone else. Divinity had already put the combination lock on the inside of the door that only we knew but they wouldn't know. Mostly Jamie. In the meantime, I was trying to find my aunt that used to live here. We were no where near New York City and that's not where she lived. She lived in a small town called Watertown and we were living in Canandaigua. While Divinity was in school, I was making my own studio in our closet so I was moving a mattress into it for the sound proofing.

When I was done with that, I decided to get our TV going too and even our sound system to go next to it. We were back to square one and it was like we were moving in together again. While I was putting my guitars in our room, I heard a giggling. A child giggling. I stood deathly still as maybe it was someone beside us or next to us, but it couldn't be. I played guitar loudly last night and our neighbors didn't hear me. I placed the guitars on the stands before grabbing a couple more and I heard it again. It was loud as day like it was right in my ear. I decided to unlock the door and peek out but there wasn't anyone in the halls. I shut the door and locked it before sitting on the couch. It wasn't uncommon that I was hearing things like this, but a child giggling was a little new. I felt a deep wave of melancholy wash over me as the intrusive thought of Divinity saying no to another baby popped into my mind. I don't know why all of these emotions were coming to me all at once. It was... a little cruel that I couldn't control them. I decided to get up and grab my acoustic guitar to write a song. I think I had done more than enough for today when it came to moving.

I knocked on the door and leaned against the wall next to it. I was so glad to be home as I had so much homework to do tonight. I didn't miss school at all. I heard the locks coming undone before the combination lock and the door opened. Prince stood there with a forced smile. "Hey, baby." He said. I frowned and walked past him to put my stuff down and he shut and locked the door. I gave him the biggest hug I could manage with my arms around his neck. "What's going through your head?" I asked him. He shook his head. "Everything." He said hugging my waste. "I want my brain to stop for a minute. I just want my music." I looked over his shoulder and saw he had set up the TV and the stereo system. "Then let's have dinner and listen to music, okay?" He nodded and pulled away. I let him turn the music on and while I was digging in the fridge he was looking through my stuff from school.

"Learn anything?" He asked as I threw some meat and cheese on the counter next to the bread. "A little. Thank you for taking care of unpacking the big stuff today." I told him. Prince came over to make himself a peanut butter and jelly. It was a sandwich night for sure. "I think I have a new alter." I almost dropped the cheese in my hands. "Huh? You do?" I was trying to play stupid. "I don't think they're nice." His eyes were squinting as if he had a headache. "What are they doing? Are they saying anything?" He was spreading the jelly onto one of the slices of bread. "I don't know if I'm putting myself down or if they're doing it. I'm having thoughts I normally wouldn't have. Thoughts I haven't had in a long time." That was worrying. "You're not...suicidal are you?" "No." He said simply. He put the sandwich together before walking over to one of the boxes that had a notebook. I turned around to wash my hands when he threw it into the counter for me to look at. "I can't talk to this one like I can Jamie and Camille. I try to but they don't talk back. I don't know if they're ignoring me." I was drying my hands as I was reading. "Liar." "Lazy." "She doesn't love you." I couldn't keep reading when I read that one and while I was reading them Prince was already in the living room on the floor eating. It was breaking my heart seeing him like this. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to go to school right now.