Azriel Capoue - The secrets of Al

CHapter 14

I took a moment to compose myself, knowing that my anxiety was reaching a boiling point. With twodeep breaths, I attempted to quell the rising panic that threatened to consume me. I closed my eyes andfocused on the sensation of the cold metal doorknob beneath my fingertips. Its chill sent shivers downmy spine.As I concentrated on my breathing, my heart raced and then slowly began to settle. The pounding in mychest eased, the swollen blood vessels in my neck receded, and my blurred vision gradually sharpened.But the fleeting calm shattered when my fingers tightened around the doorknob. The pressure of themoment overwhelmed me, causing my fingers to tremble and weaken. I was worried that I might needto use my teeth to open the door if the same pressure afflicted my other hand.I realized that if I didn't enter the house at that very moment, I might never muster the courage to do itlater. My emotions were unlikely to change, and there was no "fall back, regroup, and attack later"option for me. Even if I returned to Mira and Aunt Liz and came back a year later, the fear and anxietywould still plague me."The time is now," I mumbled to myself with closed eyes, attempting to gather my strength. Withoutfurther hesitation, I squeezed the doorknob, twisted it, and entered the house in a hurry and then shutthe door. Leaning against the door with my eyes still shut, I took a moment to catch my breath.A soothing warmth enveloped my cheeks and the nape of my neck, reminiscent of a reassuring embrace.In the realm behind my closed eyelids, I perceived a luminous, gentle light, likely emanating from one ortwo light bulbs or some other undisclosed source."Azriel, get seated," a voice called out.Huh? That voice... It sounded just like mother's."Azriel, come on. We're waiting for you," the voice urged again.I opened my eyes suddenly, and indeed, the living room was bathed in a warm, orange glow. However,that was not the most striking revelation. Just a few meters in front of me was my family. My mother,who had called me to take a seat, stood on the other side of the table, patiently waiting. Father and Azrawere already seated, and I noticed Azra surreptitiously sneaking a piece of carrot into her mouth whileavoiding Mother's watchful eye.This mischievous little thing couldn't even wait for me to get seated."Mother, Azra is stealing," I mouthed as I moved toward the table.Azra squinted her eyes and tilted her head slightly."Azra, stealing?" Mother inquired.I nodded while pulling the chair back and preparing to sit.Azra defended herself though with a calm voice, "How is it stealing when it's from my own plate?"I playfully stuck my tongue out to tease her right after I'd literally jumped into my seat. She stared backat me in silence, her eyes dark and intense, but not in an angry, ferocious way. Her glare was unnerving,almost as if she'd been possessed."Hey, stop that," I mouthed and snapped my fingers.She chuckled slightly and shook her head briefly, as if she had sensed my unease.Strangely, the sound of my own voice and the snap of my fingers reverberated in my head."Hey, stop that," I said aloud again and snapped my fingers."Hey, stop that," the snap sound followed in an echo within my mind. It was disconcerting. The snappingnoise had an odd quality to it, and with each repetition, it seemed to grow more distant.I brought my fingers close to my ears and snapped them a few times. The sound didn't grow any louder,only more remote. This auditory peculiarity left me feeling uneasy."Azriel!" Mother called, her tone bordering on command.Startled, I trembled slightly as though waking from a myoclonus jerk."Where has your mind wandered off to? Start eating; the meal isn't going to consume itself," shemouthed.For some inexplicable reason, everything suddenly felt profoundly strange. I reached for the fork besidemy plate and that's when I noticed it, though I should have sooner. The act of walking to the table,standing next to it, struggling to pull out the heavy chair, jumping to sit on it, my feet not quite reachingthe floor when I sat — these observations escaped my notice until this moment. I hadn't realized itbefore..."Why—why do I have tiny fingers?" I muttered, staring at my hands, puzzled and eyebrows raised."Why do you have tiny fingers? Well, Azriel... you're a nine-year-old girl, that's why," Father explainedwith a mischievous grin. "Or would you prefer hands the size of Mother's? At your age, that would bequite strange.""But I'm not... I'm not nine anymore," I replied, a touch of frustration in my voice."Well, you certainly look like you are," Azra chimed in.I promptly rose from my chair, feeling like I was teetering on the edge of losing my sanity, and I couldn'tdiscern why. It was as if my head were about to explode, and my heart raced to join in the chaos. I triedto recall how I had come to be at the table, but the memories eluded me. There was a pervasive sensethat I wasn't the one who had joined my family at the table. I couldn't piece together how I had arrivedor why. It felt like I had lost my memory of everything except this specific moment. It was a beautifulmoment, that much was certain, but I yearned to understand why I was there and what had transpired.There was an undeniable feeling that something was amiss, but what, and why had I missed thesepeople so intensely? As if I hadn't seen them in ages. What is happening to me? A torrent of unansweredquestions swirled in my mind.I scanned the dining room, my gaze darting to every corner, although I couldn't quite fathom what I wassearching for. Perhaps it was mere confusion that propelled me to do so."I need to leave," I uttered abruptly, pivoting on my heels and preparing to make a hasty exit. It was aninstinctive reaction.But just as I was about to escape from whatever was happening, a firm hand seized my wrist. "Don't go,Azriel... Don't leave me. Don't leave me again!" I heard Azra's voice, desperate and trembling.I turned to face her, expecting one thing and encountering something entirely different. What I sawforced the memories back into my consciousness. Azra's face had gone pallid, as if she were drained ofall color, like someone who had been lifeless for a long time. Her appearance jolted me, causing me tocrumple to the floor in shock.Mother and father rose from their chairs and advanced slowly behind Azra, casting judgmental glares myway, as though I had committed a grave offense.I remained on the floor, overcome with sobs. Azra's sudden transformation had startled me, but mysurprise quickly gave way to a profound sadness for what my family had endured during my absence.When I entered the house, I had hoped to find my family, but not like this—never like this.All the lights in the room dimmed, save for one stubborn bulb that only flickered but refused to go out. Icontinued to gaze at my family until their figures gradually faded into the darkness.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------The air felt heavy, suffocating, as if it carried an invisible burden. The flickering bulb cast eerie shadowsthroughout the room, mirroring the turmoil that had enveloped my world.Aunt Liz's voice echoed in my mind, repeating the heart-shattering news she had conveyed. Her wordsshattered my heart into countless irreparable fragments, and disbelief coursed through my veins, leavingme in a state of numb incredulity."Azriel, I'm sorry, but your parents... Azra... they are no more," Aunt Liz's voice continued to echo,leaving a trail of devastation in its wake.The room swirled around me, merging into a tumultuous whirlwind of indistinct colors and shapes. Myhands shook as I clutched my chest, attempting to hold myself together in the midst of the crumblingworld. Tears welled up in my eyes, obscuring everything except the excruciating pain that coursedthrough my soul.Memories surged into my mind, a montage of joy-filled family gatherings, tender embraces, andwhispered lullabies. I could hear my father's infectious laughter and my mother's soothing voice singingmy cherished lullaby, a melody that had comforted me through every childhood storm. Now, their voiceswere silenced forever, lost in the void of an incomprehensible tragedy.Grief washed over me like a tidal wave, drowning me in its depths. I clutched my chest, feeling as thoughmy heart might burst from the overwhelming agony. Each breath became a struggle, as if the air hadturned poisonous, choking me with its bitterness.My gaze fixed on a photograph hanging on the wall—a snapshot of my family, a perfect encapsulation ofour love and happiness. I reached out, my trembling fingers tracing the smiles forever disappeared. Howcould it all be gone? How could our world be shattered so mercilessly?A surge of anger, disbelief, and desperation overwhelmed me. My cries grew louder, my voice adesperate plea to the Source, seeking an explanation that might never come. I railed against theunfairness of it all, pounding my fists against the floor as if trying to dispel the darkness that hadswallowed me whole.Minutes stretched into hours as I remained on the floor, my sorrow blending with the chilling emptinessof the room. Eventually, exhaustion washed over me, numbing my senses and leading me into an uneasyslumber.In the darkness, as my tears dried on my cheeks, I made a solemn vow. "I will make whoever isresponsible for this pay... I swear to you, father, Mother, Azra... I swear!"The last flickering bulb followed the others into darkness. The atmosphere shifted abruptly.A cold breath grazed the nape of my neck, causing every hair on my skin to stand on end as if they'dbeen summoned. I didn't turn, nor did I react, except for the sensation on my skin. Strangely, I wasn'tfrightened."Ah, Azriel... What if I told you there was a way to bring them back? All three of them. What if I told youyour family can be reunited?" a voice intoned from the darkness.I recognized the voice from before, though now it carried a deeper, more ominous tone, the same voice Ihad heard in the dream during my incident on the way to the train station. Questions swirled in mymind—was it not a dream? Who was behind the voice? —but they were momentarily irrelevant. Onequestion took precedence."How... can I bring my family back?" I inquired without hesitation, though my voice broke."There is... a way," the voice responded. "You came here to find the book with the Trishula symbol, didn'tyou? Find it... that's the only way to bring them back."