The Downward Spiral Saga

Book Four: Harry Potter and the Return of the Lost

Dear Harry.

The healers think it's a good idea for me to write to you, try to form a relationship with you this way before we spend time with each other in person.

I think they're right.

I'm sorry for freaking out when you came to visit with Moony. Azkaban it-messed with my brain a lot.

You know how Dementors work? They feed on happy memories, make you all depressed and stuff.

The healers say that I've gotten so used to having that happen, that when I think of something happy I automatically get all sad.

Seeing you, looking so much like your father-it brought back a lot of good thoughts. But the potions they've been giving me help, kind of.

They're trying to retrain my mind, get me to think like a normal and responsible person again. Don't know how that's gonna work, cause I don't think I ever was exactly responsible, but you can't argue with the professionals.

They're talking about moving me. They say they've got a cottage near the seaside. Like a rehabilitation program type place. Not sure how I feel about it.

I could hear the waves from my cell always, so that might blow my mind.

But they say I can take walks on the beach, and be outside in the sun. I like the sunshine.

It reminds me that I'm free.

They've taken me on 'outings'.

Went to my old house. I think I'd like to move back in there, once I'm allowed to.

I hated it, growing up there. But it would give me something to do, to redecorate the place.

And I need something to keep me busy. I'm not nearly ready for a job yet. And I'm rich, anyway. Don't need a job.

Tell me about yourself, why don't you?

How's Slytherin treating you?

My whole family was in that house. I specifically got sorted into Gryffindor to piss them all off.

It worked, I guess.

I got kicked out of home eventually.

Your grandparents took me in, you know.

Amazing people, they were.

Moony says you've got a strong friend group, so I guess it can't be treating you that badly.

What do you like doing? What subjects are you taking?

Moony says you're top of your class in almost everything. That's your mum right there.