What Have We Done?..

I'm a what?..but n-no..

Chan woke up due to a bang against his walls of the door,he looked at the figure standing in the doorway as he tried to make out who it was. "Hyung! Felix is incredibly sick! Do you have medicine!?". Said a freaky hyunjin as he shook his head as he sat up looking like a mess. "Um...hyung,why do you look like that?" Hyunjin spoke again seeing chan who was a mess and kinda sweaty as he squinted his eyes at chan's appearance. "Anyways,do yo-"

"Leave me alone". Chan said as his head pounded with pain like someone was hitting his head against the wall. "Hyung! Felix is shivering to death with a fever! We don't have time for this!" Hyunjin said as he yelled making chan whimpered under his breath and kept his mouth shut "please give me a second! Please..give me a second" chan protested under his breath as he tried to breath. "I also don't feel well,hyun" chan said looking at the ground of wooden. Behind those eyes were frustrated "why are you always the shovel of the back bone!? Why are you always like this!?" Hyunjin said it was full of trembles of hidden fuss. Chan made a fist covering the parts of the blankets as he tried to block the sound squeezing his eyes shut off the huge electric pain through his body.

"What are you doing isn't helping us,hyung! If you are going to keep pulling this off then we need a leader who keeps himself still. Not an all nighter. Cause right now, you are Burden." Chan opens his eyes and looks at hyunjin with a sting of pain feeling under those eyes. "I'm a what? ...But n-no.." chan said looking at his thighs as he felt the sting of burn of tears falling off making small drops into his gray pants. "N-not like this.." hyunjin said before crying and leaving the room slamming the door as chan sat there with tears rolling slowly against his red flushed cheeks. Everything was dizzy and his head pain rose more.

Everything in his room was a mess. Cables spring around the table. Clothes left unattended and unfold on the floor. Bags being thrown in the sorts of places that he rushed out. Bed being wet of a big patch from last night of soaked clothes. Every single one of his muscles hurts like fire. He laid back down but groaned when he rushed backwards as the head pain flushed all around his head. He covered his face with his hands and thought back to Hyunjin's words. Was he really a burden? Why was he one? Did he do enough? Was he stubborn? What did he do wrong?

You.
Are
A
Burden.

Chan cried as though back, hyunjin was right. He can't be falling back. He has to be strong. He has to put his shit together. He can't risk it at all. He was the pillar to all of them. He can't have them taking care of him. No! He can't. If he had a life where he was the youngest then he'll let himself fall. But this life he has to live in. He has this group to take care of. He has to be the leader and oldest. He can't have anyone else see him fall out of the tough position. Not even his own members.

</3..