What Have We Done?..

we never asked you to.

Everything hurts. His head,face,body, throat, eyes. Jeongin was asking him something but Chan was stuck with pain and in his head hearing completely nothing from the other. His ears were ringing and his vision was blurry that he can't recognize the person talking. "Hyung? Hyung!" Chan snapped out of it and looked at jeongin standing in front of him. "Uh..yea?" "Minho said that you were supposed to get some more,so did you?" "...um sorry what?" Jeongin sighed. "The medication." Jeongin repeats himself. "Where are they?" "Who's medicine?" "Felix's." Han said coming out of nowhere. Chan blinks trying to process what they are talking about but quickly regains their whereabouts and search's for the pills but when he saw the empty bottle that Minho returned to him to refill laying on the wooden drawer floor. "I-...I d-don't know.." chan said trying to why or when he was supposed to get Felix's medicine. "I don't have them at the moment." Chan said looking at the two youngest with guilty but pain growing and crawling all over his face. "I think I'm sick...too" chan reply with a small tone of whisper trying to give a statement that he was also in pain.

Han and Jeongin looked at each other with disappointed. "You didn't get them!? I told you this morning you were supposed to get them! Can you at least done that." Minho said over hearing the conversation as he joined in. "I'm sorry I didn't have time.." chan lies to them trying hard to put everything back to it's perfect self but with all of this,he can't. "I can g-go get them. It won't take long" chan trying to rush out of the bedroom but he knocked a small table and a glass shatters. "I'm sorry" chan said kneeling down almost tipping over of how much he rushed himself downward. "I'm so sorry" chan apologize again with a sob and tears covering his vision. Jeongin sighed in frustration and someone said they will leave to check on Felix but all chan heard was that sigh a sigh of fucking up again. A sigh that settles in his heart heavily as he felt useless and a burden. All he wanted was to make things right and everyone happy. "Hyung,stop please. Your bleeding" Han said as he noticed blood tripping down on chan's hand and unable to come any closer than he already was.
"Can you guys please be quiet? Felix's head is hurting" seungmin said coming to the bedroom.

My head hurts too chan wanted to yell and beg for care. He wanted to. My body hurts...I'm in pain. All chan could do was spill out hot tears and let it mix with the blood on the floor. Why aren't they caring for him too? Why isn't deserve to be taken care of? Why couldn't they ask him how he's doing? Why can't they take him to bed in the warmth and warm food like Felix? Why doesn't he deserve to take day's off like Felix? Why can't they worry about him enough like they worry about Felix state? Why do they not put their hands on his forehead to feel fever like they did to Felix? Why doesn't he not get words that comfort him like they sooth Felix? Why did they rub Felix back when he vomited? Why did they talk to him softly? Why did they pull his back when he was throwing up? Why Felix was allowed to be sick?
"Hyung! Stop! Your bleeding!" Jeongin said as chan picks up the shards of glass pieces laying on the wooden floor. Is Jeongin mad at him too? He wants to fix everything as soon as possible..

"You've done enough,go to bed." Chan sighed loudly shaky as he kept his calm. He felt like a kid a kid that isn't important. A kid that being scolded for doing something wrong. He felt a sting of hurt in his chest like he did when he bowed in apologies to the director. "This all because you didn't go sleep?" Seungmin said out loud with a tired mutter hid in that tone. "You are embarrassing clumsy" seungmin said once again. "You should know how to sleep in time,hyung" jeongin rumble out in the conversation. "Your sleeping schedule is affecting everyone around you excluding us" Han said trying to say gently as possible but for the older,it felt like a huge swing of stab through his chest. Minho came in to check up what was happening after leaving to check on Felix. "What's happening here?" The dancer said confused not being able to stay here to see everything. "You think is easy for me to work till sunrise? Who did I stay up for!?" Chan ranted out feeling hurt and leave out. His tone was starting to fill with anger as if he was a rat being captive by humans and his only thing is to bite and escape. "I do it for all of you,all of you"

"We never asked you to." hyunjin said ramble in defense As he joins in.

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