We made it to Columbus, Ohio the summer before I started the 5th grade. Another apartment complex, much like the ones we had grown accustomed to living in for most of our lives. I was excited to be near my once distant family and my half sister Nichole. I was getting older, just a few months shy of turning 11, and began to understand the seriousness of my mothers' troubles. Kenneth had begun to understand it too, and the fighting between him and my mother was growing worse by the day.
"I don't know what your mom's problem is Phoenix. She's selfish and ungrateful. I can see that she always takes Annas' side too. Babies her too much." Kenneth would say to me as we sat on the back porch after yet another big argument between him and Lucy. He would listen to my complaints. Stand up for me to my mother, and he earned my trust. I began confiding in him every time I felt I had been wronged. Even better, now that he was home from the road a lot more often, he didn't let my mom hit me anymore.
"It's time for bed girls. Head on up to your rooms and I will be in, in a minute to tuck ya'll in." Kenneth motioned to Anna and me. I wasn't aware of it yet, but my life would be forever changed in just a few moments.
I was wrapped snuggly in my bed when Kenneth entered my room. He leaned over, in what I believed would be a kiss on the forehead, and instead he lifted my shirt and put his mouth to my chest and began licking me.
I felt my eyes widen and my heart thundering inside of my chest. I was frozen solid and didn't move. This was a violation that I naively did not see coming and knew that no one would ever believe. Then, just like that, the moment was over, and Kenneth walked out. He did not say a word.
"Do you want some biscuits and gravy Phoenix," Kenneth asked the next morning as though nothing had happened the night before.
"Uh sure" I said. Confused by what was happening. "Maybe I just had a bad dream last night?" I wondered. It would shortly become clear to me that it was not a dream at all. Kenneth would transform from the friendly stepdad that I could always confide in and look to for protection, to a vile creature that is inseparable from a monster.
"Phoenix, grab the grocery bags from the trunk please." Kenneth requested.
"No, I don't feel good, I want to go inside." I protested.
"Do it now." He demanded again.
"No I don't want to" this time pouting.
"NOW!" he shouted loudly.
"I am going to tell my mother what you did to me in the room the other night!" I threatened, tears now swelling up in my eyes.
That simple phrase immediately enraged Kenneth. His eyes fixed on me and the color left his face. He stared at me for a moment before taking off in my direction.
I tried to turn and run, but I wouldn't make it far before he grabbed me by my hair and yanked me to the ground.
I was pleading with him as he dragged my small body across the asphalt, "Please! Stop! What are you doing? Why are you doing this to me?" Kenneth then tossed me into the front passenger seat of the car and before I could regain my balance entered the driver's seat. He took off like a bat out of hell, now holding me down by my throat. Thoughts were racing through my head as I panicked.
"Where is he taking me? He is going to kill me. This is it. I'm going to die." These thoughts flew through my 10-year-old mind as I was kicking and fighting. I continued to squirm and kick until I was struck with the realization that there was no getting away. Kenneth was too strong, and he had too much control. I gave up and laid there lifeless. Not making a sound, not whispering a word, and not moving a single muscle. Kenneth continued to scream at me anyways.
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Phoenix Rises
غير روائيMy Life story. How it all began, and how I learned to rise from the ashes.