⚠️!TW: SUICIDE!⚠️
Jake's pov
I was at the party and my alarm rang. ( it was 12:00am) I stepped out for a moment and called Johnnie to tell him to sleep soon. He didn't answer. I tried again. Nothing. I assumed that he just fell asleep early even though he barely sleeps this early. I brushed it off and went back to the party. Tara approached me, "Hey Jake where's Johnnie?" "Oh he didn't feel like coming he's at home. Why?" "Nothing." She walked away and I ignored it. I partied all night.
-at 3pm the next day-
I called Tara.
-the call-
Jake: Hey Tara is Johnnie with you? Or do you know where he is? He hasn't been answering my texts or calls and I haven't seen him since before I left to go to the party.
Tara: I don't know, I've been trying to get a hold of him but he isn't answering me either, I'm on the way to his house right now. Do you want me to come pick you up really quickly and we go find him together?
Jake: okay sure
Tara: be outside in five
-Tara ended the call-
I waiting outside before Tara came and picked me up. We rushed to Johnnie's house. Tara unlocked the door and we called for him while looking all over his house. "JAKE, CALL THE AMBULANCE HURRY HE'S UP HERE," Tara shouted, I grabbed my phone and called the ambulance while running upstairs and froze. Tara was crying, holding Johnnie in her arms as there was dried blood all around Johnnie, coming from his thighs. Fresh scars. I cried as I fell to my knees and held Johnnie, shaking him in hopes that he'd wake up.
-when the ambulance came and took him to the hospital- (Jake and Tara are at the hospital waiting room)
We sat silently in the waiting room, crying. This is all my fault, if only I knew he was going to do this. I should've stayed home with him. I cried endlessly as my mind flooded with thoughts. Soon, a doctor came out and sighed, "Im so sorry for your loss, we did everything we could." No. This can't be happening. Tell me this is a dream. Please. I ran into the room and looked at his lifeless body. I hold onto him tightly as Tara and I give him one last hug. Please tell me this is a joke. Please. Wake up. I bawled my eyes out, tears streaming down my face no matter how hard I try to stop myself. Please, anyone but him. I don't care who it is, but please, please, don't take Johnnie, not my Johnnie. He's all I need. I can't live without him. I pray, hoping at this was just a dream. Eventually, the doctors had to force me to leave the hospital. They held me as they pulled me out of the room. I take one last look at him as I sob outside the room. I run out of the hospital and into the rain, not stopping until I reached Johnnie's house. I cried on his front porch, and stayed in his house for weeks, not eating or sleeping, not without him. I'd rot and cry in his room all day as Tara would come over once in awhile as she missed Johnnie too. We both do. On the day of his funeral, i looked down at his casket. He still had the matching bracelet on.
I stayed even after his funeral was over. Tara and I visited his grave everyday since that day, buying his favourite things and leaving it for him. I often found myself crying myself to sleep and waking up beside Johnnie's grave, if only he was still here.
Not long after, I found myself sitting on the same bench in the park Johnnie and I called our spot. I'm so sorry Johnnie. We'll be together very soon. I'll see you again, I promise. I thought as I stabbed myself in the heart with a knife that belonged to Johnnie, smiling for the very last time. I love you.
(Meanwhile Tara)
I was sitting at place me and Johnnie would call our spot. We would sit and talk for hours, watching the sunset and sunrise. I looked around and made sure there was nobody. I took out knife that (also) belonged to Johnnie as I carved the words "RIP 🖤" near where we carved our initials on the railing years back. I sat on the right side of the bench, where I'd always sit as Johnnie would sit on the left. I miss you more than anything. I wish you were still here Johnnie. I will see you sooner than you think. I thought of all the memories we had together before stabbing myself in the head. I'm sorry I couldn't save you.
Word count: 814
