Eternal Sunshine☀️

11. Confession

Aashna's pov:

I am at home. In my bed, I'm thinking.

Or overthinking, whatever you may call it.

I don't cry easily, at least not for humans or people who I don't love.

I don't cry for myself.

You see, I only cry for those who matter a lot to me. And I'm very selective about this list.

Mom, dad, my dog moti, in little circumstances......or any other animal who's really TOO badly hurt.

But yesterday I cried for Shubman.

He wasn't even that hurt, I mean it takes a lot for a man to cry out in pain but even I've had a wrist sprain owing to my weak body and ik what a sprain is like.

So what does it mean?

Could I be in love with him?

No, NO what am I thinking about? I can't be, it's too soon.

Yeah, right! Probably, and plus I'm on my period, so it could be my hormones too!!

Yay! End of topic, not in love with my Shub, I mean Shubman and not that 'my'.

But I wanna know how does he feel? Is it just a thing for him or it means more than that?

I wanna know more about him. So I google him, about his past relationships.

He had a few girlfriends, seen with a few girls, but wait, who is this girl he dated for so many years....Sara?......Sara tendulkar, who is she.....

Daughter of sachin tendulkar....oh wait! Yes! How can I be so dumb.

2 years older than Shub, and people loved them together? Fuck off.

Am I insecure, a little. Am I jealous, yes I am.

I am the jealous type.

She is beautiful, she looks sweet and kind and after all the research I have done, I've found that Shubman was apparently madly in love with her....ok!

They were together for sooo long and they have broken up just 2 years ago...so why is Shubman dating me...is he moved on from her? Is he using me as a catalyst to move on? Or maybe a distraction, or maybe a way for him to make her feel jealous.

How can you move on from that much in just 2 years... I mean...I had my previous boyfriend when I was 17, and it went on for 3.5 years and I still can't move on from that so is it possible for Shubman to move on fron her?

What if one day we broke up and Shubman makes no effort to get this back? Or what if I make an effort and make a fool out of myself?

I have to be careful.

I have to ask him....now it's good that he's staying for 4 more days, thanks to that sprain.

I call him up and say that I wanna meet him. And he tells me to just come over, we met a day before yesterday so it's been a day since we last met, miss him tbh but....don't show it.

I choose comfortable clothes to go meet him.

I knock on his door and put the pin and enter, I see Kanisha and Shubman talking, it seems to be something serious so I stop a few feet apart.

"We can talk about it later Kanisha, you may leave." He says in his authorised tone and Kanisha leaves.

"Hey baby! Why are you standing, come on!" I walk up to him and sit on his bed beside him.

"Tumse ek din nhi mila hu aur esa lg rha he jese kitne din ho gye?" He says.

"Esa kya tha Shubman, jo tum mere samne ussey baat nhi kar sakte the?" I ask him directly looking into his eyes.