WangXian Forever Book 10

Chapter 62: Sadness

The Emperor stares at his hands folded in his lap. He looks contemplative, thinking about his answer.

"I love my boys," he says finally, a tear rolling down his cheek. "Both of them. I loved my first wife very much. I always felt sorry for her because I knew the life of a Royal Empress is a lonely one, and she missed me too much. The days feel longer when one is separated from the one they love."

"Mn."

Wei Ying looks over to Lan Zhan, who reaches for his hand under the table. He carefully entwines their fingers together, so their hands rest palm to palm. Wei Ying squeezes them gently. It's better than nothing, but he wants to do more. If they were alone, Wei Ying would climb into Lan Zhan's lap with absolutely no hesitation at all, holding him as close as possible.

But since this is neither the time nor the place, he must wait.

"Our Royal duties kept us both busy and apart, and I knew my wife was feeling the strain in our marriage. But I would be guessing if I said she might have said something along those lines to our son. They were always very close, and I didn't doubt their loyalty. Perhaps that was my first mistake, in assuming that my firstborn would understand my position, and that he wouldn't grow up to resent me. It is such a dilemma, this situation that he has cast upon us." The Emperor sighs deeply.

"Perhaps your son doesn't have to die." Wei Ying murmurs. This is such a heart wrenching choice for the Emperor to have to make.

"But he also cannot be allowed to live." The Emperor stares back at Wei Ying, his previously warm eyes now cold, hard and unrelenting. "No matter what happens, he is a liability. I cannot turn him over to our enemies for fear of further betrayal, and no matter where I imprison him, he will use his charm and his wiles to win overthe favour of his guards and find a way to escape. No...death is the only way."

"But he's your son." Wei Ying blurts out.

"The life of an Emperor, a ruler, a king, it is no easy one." The Emperor seems to sink in his seat, visibly deflating. "If I do not put an end to his life now, I fear he will have the Mongolians swarm through our lands just for a petty revenge against myself. Think about the many thousands of lives at risk, and the chaos and destruction this single individual is capable of committing. Can you honestly tell me that I should value the one life as being more important than countless others?"

Suitably chastised, Wei Ying slumps in his seat.

"And even if that weren't the case, by leaving the First Crown Prince alive, my second son will always be in danger. I cannot risk his life, either." A heavy sigh leaves his body. "I am tired now. Please leave me." The Emperor struggles to rise, and Tang Pei is immediately at his side.

General Huang stands up to join them and together, they make their way to the bed where they help the Emperor to lie down.

Wei Ying takes Lan Zhan's hand after they stand up and they go closer to the bed.

"I am truly sorry, your Highness. I did not mean to question your methods. I hope you rest well, and please know that we are at your service." They both bow and leave his bedroom after the Emperor waves a tired hand in their direction, his eyes already closed.

***************

Wei Ying doesn't dare to speak out loud once they leave the Emperor's quarters. But he has a lot of things he wants to discuss with his husband.

That didn't go as I expected, he says to Lan Zhan through their mental connection. What do you think he's going to do?

I am not sure, Lan Zhan replies. But there must be another solution. I cannot imagine how difficult a decision it is to sentence his own son to death.

But if he kills him, what will his second son think?

Prince Wu was there when his brother decided to show his true colours. And the Emperor will secure the life of his second son by removing the danger that is the first son. Otherwise, that child's life would always be at risk.

Speaking of which, isn't it cute how close he and our daughter seem to be? What do you think about her waking up his core? That was unexpected, right? You're telling me that Bai Hua was the Healer of the Heavens! The only other person I know with such an affinity towards golden cores is Baoshan Sanren. Wen Qing studied them extensively, but even she was just skimming the surface of what we don't know about them.

Wei Ying only then realises that Lan Zhan has gotten a little stiffer, just slightly more rigid.

They enter the Jingshi then, and Wei Ying pushes him down next to their little table, and climbs Into his lap. He hugs Lan Zhan tightly like he wanted to before.

"What's wrong?" He says, resting his cheek on Lan Zhan's Broad shoulder. "You seem upset."

"I do not like the idea of Li XiWang being that close to the Prince." His beautiful golden eyes are downcast in melancholy.

"Why? We cannot help who we like."

"But I am scared the Prince might take her away from us."

"I suppose, if the Emperor asks us on behalf of his son, it's not like we can say no. But ultimately, the choice is Little Rabbit's. Not really us."

"It is not ideal, that lifestyle. But Wei Ying is right. It will be her choice." They sit quietly until there's a knock at the door.

When they open it, it's their lunch and the children arrive, not long afterwards.

Lunch is a quiet affair.

Wei Ying is lost in thought, thinking about the problem facing the Emperor and turning it over and over in his head. He chews absentmindedly, sometimes using his own chopsticks, and sometimes Lan Zhan would hold a bite next to his mouth and he is eating by second nature.

"Father Wei, is anything wrong?" Li XiWang asks him.

Wei Ying looks up and around to see the empty bowls of his family and his own. He shakes himself out of the quiet place in his head and silently tells himself off - this is supposed to be time spent with family, not for anything else.

"Ah, Little Rabbit, sorry, sorry. I was just thinking about finding a solution to a difficult situation." Wei Ying pushes the bowl away from himself and smiles.

"We could ask them their opinion," Lan Zhan says, standing up and collecting the vessels.

"Lan Zhan! They're only twelve!" Wei Ying protests. "Surely it's too much of a burden to put on their little shoulders."

Lan Zhan comes back to sit next to him. He looks at all three children thoughtfully, thinking about what he was suggesting, and whether or not they could be capable of answering.

"We can explain it, and see what they think. Out of the mouths of babes," he adds.

It was an old adage, used by midwives and nursemaids throughout the years.

"Try us," Li XiWang encourages Wei Ying, and she links arms with both Rumi and Prince Wu.