Buddie

Buck

Eddie and Christopher were Buck's favorite people. Whenever he felt the need to relax, he would go to Eddie's place to play video games with his best friend and his child.

So that is why Buck was now laying on Eddie's couch, ranting about what a terrible day he had at the job.

"And I told Bobby that I could handle it, but no. He said I wasn't the 'man for the job' and made me help Hen with the patient."

Eddie took out two beers from the fridge. It was almost midnight so Chris was already sleeping, while the two men were alone in the living room. Eddie handed one beer to Buck, and Buck made some room for Eddie to sit next to him.

"You need to relax, man. Bobby knew what he was doing. You haven't been quite...handy lately."

"What do you mean, I haven't been handy? I'm great at my job." Buck frowned and took a sip of his beer.

"Never said you weren't. It's just that your mind has been elsewhere for the past couple of weeks and you've done some...mistakes." Eddie averted his gaze and sipped on his own beer.

"Is this about the mall thing? I told you guys a thousand of times that I didn't see the loose screw. Anyone could have done that mistake."

"It's not about the mall thing. Although that was really a rookie mistake, if I'm being honest." Buck rolled his eyes at Eddie's comment. "No, it's about your girlfriend. I mean, ex-girlfriend."

Buck gave Eddie the deadliest death stare known to mankind.

"I am not responsible for Taylor's own choices. Made behind my back, by the way." Buck took another sip of his beer. He hated the Taylor subject.

"We know. I know. But every time we try to talk to you when we're not on a call, you zone out and you don't even hear us. It's like you're on another planet."

If he was being honest, he was quite distracted lately. But it wasn't about Taylor; he hasn't thought about Taylor in weeks. Something has changed. Ever since Taylor, he couldn't think about dating other girls. Not because of Taylor. Sure, he cared about her, but he was over her. No, something else didn't let his mind and heart rest, and he couldn't understand what that was.

Thankfully, Eddie was there to talk to.

"So what's going on, man?" Eddie asked.

Buck didn't realize it before, but he needed someone to ask him that question. He needed Eddie, his best friend, to ask that question. He could talk about anything to him.

"I-I don't know. It's weird, but I feel like I'm missing something in my life. Like it is within reach, right in front of me, but I just can't see it, you know? And I have thid giddy feeling in my heart like I am supposed to be getting that thing but I need to do something first and I can't quite put my finger on what that is."

Buck looked Eddie in the eyes. Eddie nodded, spacing out.

"Hm. Yeah, I think I understand. It is the same for me. After Shannon died, I felt like a chapter of my life ended and after I healed from her loss, I kind of got the chance to start a new one. Thing is, no chapter ever feels right, you know? So I am always looking for something that I know is supposed to be mine but I can't find it. Or, maybe, it is right in front of me and I can't start it."

Buck nodded and downed the last sips of his beer.

"Yeah. Well, I should go. It's quite late and I've kept you up enough."

"No no no, you're not going anywhere. You drove here and you're not driving back after that beer. Especially not with Athena on duty tonight, she'd kill me for letting you go."