Buddie

Buck

What the fuck was that?

Buck drove, annoyed, and found himself at Bobby's place. He wanted to vent and he knew that his sister was too busy with Jee at the moment. It was almost dinner time and he was extremely hungry - he thought about Eddie's date all day that he couldn’t even eat. He only fed Christopher and zoned out while he ate.

Bobby and Athena were making dinner, that was for sure, because Buck could smell the divine food from the driveway.

He rang the bell and Athena opened the door.

"Buck?" She asked, confused.

"Is Bobby here? Can I come in?"

"Yes, we're making dinner. Are you alright?" She asked worried.

Athena stepped out of the way and let Buck get in. She didn’t get to close the door because he went in for a tight hug.

"Hey, hey!" She said, patting him on the back. "Everything is okay."

Buck let all his frustration go with that hug. Athena and Bobby were the parents he never had and he loved them a lot. There was no surprise that he ended up at their house for comfort.

After he broke the hug, Athena closed the door and the two went in. Bobby was in the kitchen. When he saw Buck, he came out to welcome him and Buck hugged him as tight as he had hugged Athena. Bobby hugged him back, confused, but comforted him the best he could.

"Hey, kid! What happened?"

When Buck broke the hug, he realized he had cried and he swept the tears from his face.

"I had a fight."

"A fight? With who?" Bobby asked, concerned.

"Eddie."

The two sat down at the table while Athena went to check in the food and then came back to them and sat next to her husband.

"Something is going on with me."

Bobby looked confused at Buck.

"So it was your fault? The fight?"

"What? No. I mean...I don’t know. It might have been." Buck waited and collected his thought before he spoke again. "You noticed I haven’t really been myself lately."

Bobby nodded. "The Taylor break up messed with your head, that's normal."

"See, that is what everyone thinks, but that's not true. I haven’t thought about Taylor in weeks and I have no regret or trauma from the break up."

"So what's going on?"

Buck shook his head. "I think I messed up things with Eddie because I...got...jealous."

"Jealous? What, he has other friends than you? Buck, you're over reacting. Eddie is allowed to have other friends."

Buck shook his head.

"He went on a date. With a girl."

Bobby squinted his eyes.

"O...kay? Sorry, I'm not seeing the problem here. Eddie has been trying to get over Shannon for a long time. I think he deserves to be happy, don’t you?" Bobby asked.

Buck nodded.

"Unless you wanted to ask the girl out before him," Athena said, taking on her detective role.

Buck rolled his eyes.

"That's what Eddie said and it's far from the truth. The reality is...I don’t think I wanted...Eddie...to go on a date."

"I'm sorry, I'm not following." Bobby frowned. "You just said you wanted him to be happy."

"I do but....I don’t understand it either. He's my best friend, right? I should be happy that's he's dating, but I'm not."

Athena gave him a knowing look and she smiled. She put a hand on Buck's hand and looked him in the eyes with motherly love.

"I think that you need to think about what you really feel for Eddie."

Buck frowned, confused.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean..." she said, looking at her husband to make sure he knew what she meant, "that you might not think about Eddie as a friend. Not just a friend. Think about it and I think you'll get your answer."

Athena smiled and Buck thought about it.

"You might not think about Eddie as a friend." Oh!

Buck really thought about what that meant. Friends don't notice their friends' body heat when they sleep in the same bed. They don’t get nervous and excited when they see them. They don’t fall asleep with their shampoo smell in their mind, hoping they could fall asleep with that smell every single night.

"Do you...think I am in love with Eddie?"

Athena smiled and patted his hand. Bobby smiled too.

"If you think that is the right way to describe your feelings, then yes." Bobby said.

Buck nodded and it dawned on him how right they were. Buck was in love with Eddie and all the fight was because Buck was jealous. He didn’t want Eddie to go out with Marisol because he had feelings for Eddie.

Buck smiled.

"I am starving," he declared and his parents, because he couldn’t call them otherwise, laughed.

Bobby brought the food and the three ate together like a small family.

Buck smiled to himself. He finally knew why he had been feeling so empty lately. He finally realized why every time he thought about love, thought about women, it didn’t feel right, like it wasn’t the whole truth. And he realized why Eddie was the one to always get him out of his emptiness and make him feel complete. That was the reason why he always went at Eddie's place to spend his free time. Love wasn’t as monochrome as Buck thought. Love was so much more colorful, so much more different and he fit into that.

Finally, he was free. Free to be himself and love someone he never thought he would ever love, and it felt so right.

Now the problem was, how would he tell Eddie all of that without ruining their friendship?