My Thoughts Taint Your Look [ a regretevator partybeetle au ] [SMUTFIC]

Fight

( TW for mentions of self harm, suicide, and violence. There's also a section of unwanted touching/touching without consent. Read at your own risk. )

Poob stared at themselves in the mirror. They checked every party fo themselves. Their hair was fixed up. Their outfit was comfortable enough. And thier party hat was in its usual place. They didn't really have a reason to do this, other than to stall themselves some time. They had a lot to look forward to for tonight. The party, the socializing, and the confrontation. They shuddered over the thought, but it had to be done. For once in their life, they had to say no. They had to stand up for themselves. And they couldn't let their friends and their thoughts control them. They looked at the time on their phone. The party would start 30 minutes from now, so they had to head over now. They gave one last good look at themselves in the mirror, before heading off and pressing on the regretevator button. They wait for a while, anxiously tapping their foot. Maybe something good can happen tonight. Maybe.

The doors of the elevator opened, letting Poob go in. They stood in the corner of the small room, watching as the doors closed on them. The elevator space seemed so tight and claustrophobic, even if it was just so empty. Actually, it wasn't as empty as Poob would've thought. Wallter was also in the elevator, noticing the noob walking right in. He already had a few problems to think about, so he didn't pay much attention to Poob. What made him get out of his thoughts was noticing how their actions seemed off. Their nervous look and foot tapping made him feel a sense of worry for them, wanting to know what was making Poob so worried.

" ...Something wrong my fellow? " He asked.

" Ah! It's nothing! I'm uh...Just nervous! " Poob said. " I didn't go to a party in so long so I'm just jittery!

" Oh! Well isn't that fun. " Wallter said with a smile. " How long has it been? "

"  few weeks? I honestly forgot! I'm just worried about it... " Poob said, looking away from the concrete man.

" ...Well, Poob. " Wallter started. " I don't know what exactly makes it a problem...but please don't make a big fuss to the point it worries you! I'm sure the party you will go to will be lovely. "

" ...I hope so. " Poob said quietly.

The two waited as each floor was shown, only building up more of Poob's anxiety. They were at least glad the elevator was taking its sweet time to get to their floor. They watched as people came by and went, even having to say goodbye to Wallter when he got off to the 3008 floor. Each floor passed by...until the floor they were supposed to get off revealed itself. They say the doors open to the night sky, seeing a house in the far distance with lights escaping the windows and faint music blasting. They were so hesitant to get off at first, slowly walking out and heading to the house. Their thoughts were going haywire, making them feel so unfocused and disoriented. It was like they were willingly walking to an obvious trap. They had to take a minute to sit down on the porch of the house, still wondering if it was even a good idea. They could hear people loudly talking and having the time of their life inside, ironically making them feel a sense of calm. It reminded them of what made them start partying for so long. The loud noises of fun were so soothing and made them distracted from their pain even for a while. They wished it stayed like that. They wished they never came out about their issues with their friends. They just wished they had their only 'good' mechanism not tainted by their issues. They just wished it was as fun as before.

Poob stepped inside the house, not getting much attention from the other party guests. It was exactly what they wanted. Not to be noticed or given as much attention as possible. They didn't want people to circle around them, and possibly have to confront their friends sooner than expected. They just wanted to blend with the other people. They walked over to the snack bar and fixed themselves a plate and a cup of soda, sitting down on a couch and watching everyone have fun talking to each other and playing around. It gave them a chuckle, reminding them of how they used to be. Oh how they missed just having innocent fun at parties. They could still remember when they realized how parties were so helpful when it came to their issues. It probably wasn't the healthiest, but it made them the happiest. At least they didn't have to place a blade anywhere on their skin. It was such a shame that it was all ruined. All that parties did now was make them feel disgusted and ashamed. Mostly from the "help" their friends would do. God did it just feel so shameful. Maybe now they could get everything over with. Maybe when this was over, they could finally go back to their coping mechanism. They just wanted to-