I'll Come Running

Chapter 24

Jessie couldn't believe that was the end of her and Rafe once more. She rode to the airport thinking Rafe would call her or stop her somehow, but he didn't. She walked to the gate thinking that she would hear Rafe's voice call out to her as he ran to catch her, but she didn't. She thought maybe she would touch down in OBX and see Rafe already there, but that didn't happen either. Rafe never came. Jessie wondered if that was how Rafe felt four years ago when he realized he would never see Jessie again. How many days or weeks or months did it take him to no longer have hope that she would come running back to him? Jessie could never forget the endless calls and texts she got from Rafe when she first left, but she could never bring herself to block him. It didn't take long for her to get to Manhattan before she got a new phone, only giving JJ the number through the mail. Jessie wondered how many times Rafe called and texted the old number before he eventually gave up... did he give up? Jessie finally got a taste of her own medicine, and she couldn't help but feel even worse for Rafe. She was pulled out of her thoughts when her cab had arrived back at the Chateau, all the pogues running out and yelling things out of excitement. Unfortunately, their beaming smiles weren't enough to coax Jessie out of her sadness, but, as she always does, she put on a semblance of a smile. 

JJ was the first to get to the cab, as he opened Jessie's door, he immediately pulled her into a hug.

"Hey sis." JJ exclaimed as he breathed a sigh of relief. JJ was so happy to see that Jessie had made it back and that she was okay. Well, at least physically. Jessie tried to fake a smile and act like she was overjoyed to be back with the pogues, yet her heart longed to be in two different places: either with Rafe in the Bahamas or with her daughter back in Manhattan. She couldn't make up her mind which she wanted more in that moment. She managed a half smile to JJ and the rest of the pogues as she greeted them.

"Is this what I think it is." JJ said in disbelief as he pulled the two large duffel bags out of the cab's trunk.

Jessie turned around and nodded her head with a smile. She couldn't say exactly what was in it, obviously, the cab driver was still there and had no idea. But as soon as the pogues watched the driver pull away, Jessie began to speak.

"200 million. Cash money." Jessie said, not even looking at JJ as she kept her eyes on the taxi driver.

"Is he far enough away yet for us to celebrate?" John B asked nonchalantly.

"Nooot quuuuuite." JJ replied as they all waited for the driver to make the turn out of the driveway.

"Alright, he's gone." JJ said as he started running around the yard of the chateau like a chicken with its head cut off. All the pogues screamed and celebrated like they had found the gold all over again. They were elated, Jessie had never seen so much excitement. Jessie only giggled at the pogues, not truly being able to celebrate with them. Her mind and her heart were else where. As she watched the pogues celebrate she zoned out into her own world, thinking of Rafe and Charlotte. She didn't care about the money, she wanted the both of them, preferably together.

"Jess? You listening?" JJ asked loud enough to interrupt Jessie's racing mind.

"Huh?" Jessie replied as she shook her head, trying to focus back in.

"I was saying, you've gotta take some of this. You deserve it. You need this... for you and Charlotte." JJ answered as his voice got quieter. The pogues had reigned themselves back in as well, silently agreeing with nods. The pogues clearly wanted her to take her cut, but Jessie couldn't bring herself to do it. She may have gained a fortune, but she lost everything... again. It felt like blood money. She could never take it because she would be reminded of the painful memories of what it took to get it.

"No, really, I can't. I told you guys from the beginning I didn't want a penny and I still don't." Jess insisted. The pogues all tried to continue to convince her but Jessie only shook her head in defiance. "Seriously, guys. I can't, and I won't. Take it... enjoy it." Jessie said with a sincere smile on her face. Jessie genuinely wasn't jealous of this fortune the pogues now had, she was truly happy JJ had what he needed to get him through, that's all she ever wanted for him.

Sarah finally came forward, looking at Jessie with pity and curiosity.

"So... do I really... have a niece?" Sarah asked with hope in her voice. Sarah had been thinking about what this meant for her too. She was beyond excited.

Jessie only laughed and nodded her head yes. "Yeah... you all do." Jessie replied as she looked at all the pogues. They all began to tear up as they realized what this meant. Not only did they have their older sister back, the one that always believed in them and took care of them, but now they had a niece to spoil and love on forever. Now they all had a bond that could never be broken again. They all gathered around each other, forming one big hug and uttered words of love among each other. They were proud of what they had accomplished, and yet Jessie couldn't feel like a worse person. Despite her joy of finding an old family in the pogues once more, her heart was still missing something. She knew what it was, but she couldn't tell the pogues.

That night the pogues spent the evening still acting like nothing had changed. Despite being multi-millionaires, they partied like pogues, drinking beer, chilling in the hot tub, and just joking around like they were as poor as they came. They didn't know what tomorrow held, but for tonight, they were pogues.

"For the record..." Sarah began to speak as she sat beside Jessie on the porch. "I don't think Rafe's going to let his daughter go now that he knows." She said as she took a drink from her aluminum can.

Jessie just sighed and adjusted herself in her seat. "Yeah, I don't think so either. That's what I'm afraid of." Jessie admitted.

"Look, I get that Rafe's not perfect. And I completely understand why you left and didn't tell anyone. But Rafe never let you go. He still hasn't. He's tried to fill that void for years and has never been successful. I'm telling you, he can't let it go, Jess. And I don't think you should be afraid of that. I think this is an opportunity to get back what was lost years ago." Sarah stated.

"I don't know, Sarah." Jessie hesitated as she took a drink. 24 hours ago, she might have agreed with Sarah. But seeing how Rafe dismissed Jessie just hours ago, as if she was scum on the bottom of his shoe, really showed her that maybe he really hadn't changed.

"Well, I do. But maybe it's just some food for thought." Sarah said plainly.

Jessie definitely thought about Sarah's words that night as she lay in bed. Maybe Rafe really wasn't over her. But how long would it take for him to realize that and do something about it? Maybe she was the one that needed to make a move? After all, she was the one that left him, twice. But she had every reason to, both times! Jessie couldn't think about it any longer, it was making her head hurt. She opted to try and go to sleep.

- - -

"You sure I can't got with you, Jess?" JJ pleaded once more as he loaded Jessie's luggage into the cab. Jessie just laughed, thinking how sweet it was that JJ was so ready to meet his niece. He had been bugging Jessie all morning about it.

"I'm sure, JJ. I need some time with her, to explain some things that she deserves to know. I know she's only three but I need to prepare her with what she can handle. But I promise, as soon as I get settled back in, you'll be the first person I call to come and see her." Jessie assured. JJ understood, and with that, they said their goodbyes. This goodbye was much different— much better— than the first. This time there was a promise to see each other again, and to stay in contact. That's all JJ could ask for. Jessie said her goodbyes to the pogues as well.

"You let me know if there's anything I can do for you." Sarah said as she gave Jessie a warm hug. "And don't be afraid to reach out to Rafe, no matter how much you think he doesn't want to hear from you, I promise he does." Sarah said once more. She couldn't let that hope go, but that's mainly because she's seen how much Rafe loved— loves— Jessie, and she knows deep down without even talking to him, how much he still wants her. There were a lot of things about Rafe Cameron that Sarah could never quite figure out, but his love for Jessie despite years of heartbreak and distance, was one of the only things she was sure of. Jessie just tried to shrug it off and politely take Sarah's advice.

Jessie finally made it to the airport gate, once again repeating the same thoughts. Maybe Rafe would come running through that gate trying to stop Jessie from making the biggest mistake of her life. After this there was no going back. As she looked back one last time, she realized she was out of time. And with that, she stepped on the plane back to Manhattan.