Heartdriven: Too Driven To Drive

14. Maybe This Time

As predicted, Sebastian was nothing but supportive during the talk on the flight. Alice explained her anxiety about doing a full race calendar while still being fragile, but still feeling committed to the team. He didn't care about that. But it was important to her. That damn pride.
She really did enjoy her work and travelling with the circus, but last season had been so hard for her, with her personal life getting in the way of enjoying life. Then she thought, well maybe she should just do it and finally get to enjoy it on her own terms. But Sebastian pointed out, that her worries were valid, and that the fact that they even existed in the first place should be consideration for her to take it easy for a bit.
God, she loved him.
Red Bull had always been helpful, following along with her requests of less or more workloads. She knew who had something to do with that, and she would just have to take that benefit for what it was. Having already yelled his ears off about it in the past, she had to remind herself that she was qualified and valued in her position beyond her relationship to Sebastian.
But that little doubt was always going to be in the back of her mind as long as they were working together.

Sebastian went to meet with Christian Horner by himself first, in attempt to smooth things out, after running off from his media duties. Alice had agreed they would tell the full story to those who needed to hear it and could keep it private, as she was not ready for the whole paddock to share it. But Sebastian had certainly needed a good excuse to blow off work, she wasn't sure it was enough...
Stayed back in his Milton Keynes apartment meanwhile, her stomach had become a bit upset during the flight, so she spent most of the day on the couch feeling like a potato. At least she could get pizza delivered for lunch. With extra garlic bread.
She felt a bit guilty, eating all that, as she was cleaning up. She had tossed her bra again, and was worrying about that delicious food going right to her breasts. She felt them in her hands again. They really didn't feel bigger and the soreness was wearing off. Maybe it had just been a momentarily pain, she had had it before... just not when someone had been groping them.
Maybe she did eat too much, as some of it wanted to make its return, barely just making it to the toilet before escaping up her throat. She had gotten rid of the habit of throwing up when the memories revived, she did not need it to return now without her thoughts even going there. But it probably didn't mean anything.

Sebastian returned later in the evening, and she was ready to eat again. He cooked pasta for them, and explained that his meeting with Christian had gone fine. He had been upset, angry in fact, but he had just needed to get it off his chest. What were they going to do about it anyway? So they quickly resolved it and moved on. Sebastian had that ability, to make people forget they were angry with him. She suspected it was the eyes and let him know so.
"I got you something," he left her in the kitchen and went to the entrance, coming back with a big, big box in gift wrapping.
"Wh-It's not my birthday." She felt along the festive and colourful wrapping as he put the present down in front of her.
He gave his shoulders a little lift, "I just wanted... to get you a wedding gift."
Still sat in the kitchen chair, she pulled him down to kiss him. "I didn't get you anything."
"If I expected something in return, it wouldn't be a gift. It's just a little thing, I thought you needed." He sat down on his chair and excitedly watched her with anticipation.
"I can tell by the box it's not a little thing, babe."
She had long been complaining about packing and lack of space to bring all her requirements along, and he had listened to that and thought enough, as inside the box was a large suitcase. With wheels.
"I love it," she went to him and straddled herself across his lap to embrace him, "Thank you." Giving his lips a few tastes, still strong with tomato flavour.
His lap was way too comfortable to get up from, but they had to clean the table and she managed to pull herself off his thighs and lips. Not for long though, as soon after the dishwasher was filled, she was on her knees in front of him, lifting up his shirt, and nibbling and licking up his stomach. And he just stood and let it happen, slightly leaning against the kitchen counter as she unbuckled his pants. So quickly he was ready for her mouth, she barely got to lick further around his loins before his stake was craving to be felt by her tongue. Holding onto the table to restrain himself, she was running her hands up and down thighs to push him against her mouth. His breath was so audible she felt it fill up the room and kept going with her lips around him. There was barely a warning before the moans of release, and she coughed holding it back in her mouth, as she rushed to the sink and spat him down the drain. That was quite the surprise. 
"Ffffffuckkkkkk...", his last breaths let escape. He reached for her as she was washing her mouth under the faucet, pulling her into his arms, kissing her neck. The arms went from her back down to her buttocks, pressing her hips against him by his fingers deep into her skin.
Her hands on his chest, she slightly pushed herself away from him, "I love you. Thank you for the wedding gift."
"I love you, Alice."
He kissed her again and she took a step back, "I think I'm going to go to bed... I'm a bit tired."
Quickly zipping his pants, he followed her step, "Are you alright, is something the matter?"
"I just haven't been feeling well today..."
"Is that why you have that stuck on your face?", pointing to the frown between her eyebrows.
"Yes... No...," she turned away from him, "I know I said it was normal for my period to be late when I wasn't taking my birth controls..."
"Alice. Stop. Don't say it."
"And then my breasts were sore, and I was throwing up earlier today... my stomach is turning inside..."
Starting to gnaw on her nail, he put his hands on her shoulders to calm her, "Sweetie, I don't think the symptoms happen that fast. Maybe you just caught a bug in Vegas."
"But maybe if I didn't?", quickly turning to him, he was closer than expected and she took a step back, lowering her voice to match her thoughts, "Maybe if it's because... because... and the symptoms are starting earlier because my body is fighting it? Like... you know..."
His arms went around her before she could finish the thought, him knowing what it would do to her. "Why don't we go see Doctor Heather when we get back home?"
"Okay. Okay. Okay," sniffling against his shirt.
He pulled back and stroked across her hair and kissed her forehead, "Do you want to stay back here tomorrow?"
"No, I need to settle the work thing, or it's just going to be running around my head."
"Are you going to be alright while I shower?", his hands sliding down to hold hers.
She nodded bravely for him and wiped the remaining tears away, "Yes," sniffling a bit more, "I'll just go to bed."
"Try not to think about it." It was easy to tell he didn't want to leave her behind, even just a few metres in the apartment, as he gave her another kiss and his looks followed while he headed to the bathroom.
She shut off some lights and took a glass of milk. A few drops spilled on her shirt, and she looked down her body, lifting up her shirt and staring at her stomach. Feeling a bit around, she couldn't feel anything, hoping she would know by placing her palm in the middle. But it was just silence, quiet, she felt nothing... nothing but the hope that something was growing inside of her, and that her body wouldn't reject it this time.