Heartdriven: Too Driven To Drive

1. Dear Sebastian

    Dear Sebastian.

I never expected to be writing this letter. But I have no choice.
I have to leave. I don't know where I am going. It is not by my own wish, but I have no other option. I am sorry. Please believe me, there was no other option.

I have so many regrets. I wish I could talk to you and tell you everything, but it is an urgency that I can't begin to put into writing. Just like my feelings for you. You are my whole world and I have to protect you from myself. I love you, Sebastian, I love you. But I can't drag you into this.

You must know how much I love you, I love you so much it hurts. That, I don't regret. But I need to keep you safe.
I hope that I will get to see you again, that this can all be over, and I will get to explain everything to you.

Every day I will think about seeing you again. Even writing this letter now, I miss you. I said I want to raise children with you and grow old with you, and that was no lie. And I won't lie to you now: that is still my wish, to spend the rest of my life with you, but maybe it was only a dream. I don't know how long I will be gone, but if you find someone who makes you happy and can fulfil your wishes, you should take that opportunity and forget about me. Don't let me come in the way of your happiness. I just want you to be happy. You are the love of my life. I am sorry. For everything. I love you. Goodbye.

    Yours, Alice.

    P.S. I have been hiding a bag in your office of a few personal things. You can go through it, if you want to. You don't have to. But I would like for you to save it and keep it safe, in case I will need it at some point.