ᴍɪɴᴅ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ᴍᴀᴛᴛᴇʀ | ᴘᴀɪɢᴇ ʙᴜᴇᴄᴋᴇʀs

1.2

'Pretty When You Cry' Lana Del Rey

I'll wait for you, babe, that's all I do, babe

~~~~~~~~~~~*

Sevyn Imani Edwards

I sighed, wiping the sweat off my forehead with the back of my hands as i walked out the doors of my dance studio. I finally had some time to myself after working all week and as grateful as i was that i could see paige 24/7, a part of me craved to be alone—to have time to think and let my thoughts regroup.

There wasn't anything specific that i wanted to think about. I just wanted some space to breathe.

I haven't had time to do anything that i enjoyed—besides taking pictures—so i figured my first stop on my day off would be an early morning trip to the dance studio.

I stood outside, the early morning sun beaming down on my skin—which was surprising for Connecticut—since its fall. I was expecting it to be cloudy and cold around this time. I got on my phone, getting ready to call danny for a ride back home but i ended up seeing an incoming call from paige instead. My eyebrows furrowed before i answered and held the phone up to my ear.

"hello?" i answered.

'hey are you home?'

"no i left for the dance studio early this morning, why?"

'oh um..i'm kinda at your door already..i wanted to see you before practice'

"well i'm calling danny to pick me up and it's not too far from my apartment, do you mind waiting?"

'actually i can't...i have some other shit to do—but i'll stop by later tonight i promise'

"okay then...i'll see you later"

'yeah..later'

The line went dead and i looked down at my phone. Confusion was plastered all over my face. She sounded...different. Like she was distant. It wasn't her normal tone of voice—it reminded me of when we stopped talking for that week or so—when she called me a distraction. Her tone of voice was the same and it made me worry.

I felt my palms getting sweaty and i took a deep breath, wiping my hands on the sides of my leggings. "don't overthink sevyn" i whispered to myself.

I took a deep breath and called danny to let him know i was ready for him to come get me. As i waited, i could feel the anxiety rushing through my veins. My body went cold as my heart began beating faster by the second. This is what happens but i push my feelings away instead of talking about them. It always hits me all at once.

Why did she sound upset?
Did i do something wrong?
Is this about what geno said?
Had she finally realized that i was a distraction to her?

All my thoughts were rushing me all at once and i found myself fidgeting with my shaking hands. I stared at them, trying to steady my breathing and stop them from shaking so violently.

I had gotten so attached to her in a mere amount of time that i found myself panicking at the thought of her leaving. She couldn't just leave like that, right?