Joost And me

Through her eyes

JOOST:

She gently placed her hand on my side, I felt the butterflies flutter through my stomach and legs.

She looked at me questioningly with her special green eyes, her mouth was slightly open and her breathing became heavy. She smelled like flowers and I wanted to rip that blanket off her body.

I felt like I could finally care for someone when she passed out in the large crowd before my concert. That I could forget my loneliness for a moment to care for someone else.

But she appeals to me with more than just that, I don't want to ruin it or scare her.
I kiss her tenderly on her neck, so tenderly that she feels my mustache tickling her ear.
Her breathing speeds up and suddenly she stops me. She pushes me away from her.

"What is?" I ask in a horny voice.

"Sorry I can't do this, I'm sorry" She looks at the ground and her eyes look sad.

"What can't you do? What do you think I have planned for you?" I get a little angry with myself and take it out on her, I feel the loneliness in my heart again.

She looks clearly shocked by the reaction I give. I get it too, one moment I'm kissing her neck and now I've raised my voice.

"Give me my clothes and you'll be rid of me." She speaks with a curled lip because she is angry too.

I walk to my armchair where her clothes are located, I had neatly folded them for her.
I turn around with tears in my eyes and no idea why this affects me so much.
I grab her clothes and wipe away my tears, I turn around and throw the clothes in her direction at full speed.

She watches as her clothes hit the ground, clearly annoyed she picks up her clothes.

"I'm sorry, but did I fucking ask for this? Apparently respect is hard to come by from you" Her voice cracks with anger.

"What didn't you ask for? You come to my concert like a junkie and I was just trying to help. You are just proof of a spoiled brat" I put my hands over my head and I don't understand this conversation anymore.

"If you knew me, you would know that I am anything but that." She is clearly emotional, she makes wild gestures with her hands.

"Please get out of my house before I call the police and say someone broke into my house under the influence."

"Do that, then I will say that an arrogant wannabe rapper forced me to stay here"

"No one forces you, you just have borderline, look at how you react to everything"

"I have borderline? Or do you have borderline?"
She lets out a fake smile at the sentence she just said, sighs, and then pulls the blanket off her.

I try not to look, but I still see her quickly getting dressed. Her eyes are wild, just like a manic person, unclear whether this is still from the XTC or whether this is her character when she is angry.

"Shoes? Where are my shoes?" She looks around lost.

I sit on my couch and point to the hallway next to the couch.

"There, bitch"

She puts on her shoes and a moment later I hear the front door slam shut. The blow is so hard that I almost thought the window would be blown out.

I still laugh out loud even though I'm alone now, like a psychopath without limits. I still think about this all and yet I miss her around me even though I don't know her at all.