The one who doesn't lie

Chapter 4

When I finally wake up it's 3am. Noticing no lights were on anywhere, I knew everyone was asleep. I wish I wouldn't have fallen asleep since I have to work later today. I have a work from home job so I only need my laptop and wifi. It's nice but also makes me sleepy.

I change into one of my swimsuits to go for a swim, where I live at it's cold and snowing one day. The next it's 80 and sunny out. You just have to take advantage of it when you can. I dip my toes into the water first then jump in. The water feels good since it's warm outside. I finally sticking my head out of the water I lie on my back and swim backwards.

I see a shadow and jump. "Oh my axel you scared the shit out of me." I scream.

He doesn't say anything. "How long have you been sitting there?" I ask him getting irritated that he didn't say anything.

"I've been out here the whole time." He says. Staring at the sky. It was very beautiful. You could see every star in the sky. It was bright. The moon was full.

"How come you're divorcing your husband?" He asks me taking me off guard. I take a second to answer because why does he even care.

"It's a long story." I tell him. Not wanting to talk about it really. "Well it looks like we got time." He says. I wish he wouldn't have.

"Well. A few years ago we found out I couldn't have kids so ever since then he started cheating on me. I knew he was just didn't want to believe it. Eventually I just wanted out but knew I needed proof. One night I followed him and recorded him fucking another girl and after getting the courage I showed him the video and left." It felt good to get it all out. I've been stressed. Scared he won't let me go. Not that he's ever hit me or anything. But because I've loved him for so long I think he'll convince me to go back. I have to be strong. I have to move on.

"Can't have kids huh?" He asks me. Taken off guard again. I really didn't think he cared or even was listening. "Yeah we both went a got checked out. The doctor called and told him I couldn't have kids and he's resented me ever since. It was just a matter of time. What really hurts is just the fact we were so in love in highschool. I couldn't imagine a life without him. But even when I was with him I wasn't. Which made it easier to leave." I say to him not wanting to look him in the eyes as the tears sprung to my eyes. I felt them wanting to pour down my face but I wouldn't waste my tears on him. Not anymore.

"What about you. Why are you single?" I ask him

"I never said I was" Axel responds all too quickly.

"You like that answer don't you?" I say dipping under the water again before getting out of the pool. "See you later." I say as I grab my towel and head back inside to take a shower. I turn the shower on letting the warm water take over my body and finally letting my tears out that I've been wanting to. Letting the stress go from my body.

"What did you mean by that?" Axel says.

"Um hello I'm in the shower." I say to him sternly.

"Answer the question." He says just as sternly as I was.

"I just meant that you don't like to answer people's questions but have no problem asking others questions. It's a one sided thing with you." I say opening the shower curtain just enough o stick my head out. "I don't know if you're just scared to open up or if it's just your aura. I just don't care. Now if you would leave." I say closing the shower curtain again.

"I answer people's questions just not yours." He says to me. I don't answer because what kind of bull crap is that. "I don't have a girlfriend and I don't want one. It's too much and honestly I'm just not ready." I was surprised by his belated answer.

"Why aren't you ready?" I ask him.

"My mom died when I was little and my dad beat me for it. Blaming me for her death. So I don't want the responsibility of another human in my life." He quietly answers after a long silence. I honestly thought he had left the bathroom until he spoke again. I shut the shower off and grab my towel to wrap around me opening up the shower curtain.

"Your dad sounds like an asshole, it wasn't your fault that your mom passed away and you shouldn't blame yourself for it either." I say to him as I grab my toothbrush from the sink.

"You don't know the story you can't say that." He says. I look over at him and asking him to tell me.

"It was raining really hard outside. And I had left my stuffed bear at my friends house. I couldn't go to sleep without it. Finally my mom gave in to go get it even though my dad was telling her not to. She was walking to my friends house and a drunk driver didn't see her from the rain and ran right into her. She died on the spot." He says to me without looking me in the eyes. I rinse my mouth out and grab his face to look at me.

"It's not your fault. You were too young to understand the danger. And all you wanted was to go to bed. It wasn't your fault." I repeated to him. He grabbed my hand and gave me a small smile. I could see in his eyes the pain of reliving that memory. We stood there what felt like so long. My hand on his face and his hand over mine. I could t stop staring at him. His vulnerable side made him look so hot. I wanted to pounce like a cat in heat. I let go and said goodnight and walked to my room shutting the adjoining bathroom door behind me.

Although I feel closer I'm in no position to be getting into anything else. I just want to focus on me and get myself to where I want to be. I have goals and I will meet them. I finally make myself fall back asleep just to wake up in 2 hours, at 7am to be at work at 8am.