𝐀 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐑𝐞𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐚𝐥𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

𝟐𝟓

Arya

     There are four of us in this bedroom and yet it's so quiet you can hear a pin drop. I wiped the remaining dried blood from Hugh's back, the Illyrian male I'd cut the wings off. The other two females, Laila who was the first Illyrian and Nadia the third, were sat on both ends of the bed, a warm blanket wrapping each of them.

"I'll get a healer to come and check your wounds once you're back home. Just to be sure it's clean and healing on the right path," I whisper to the three as I hand Hugh a shirt. I turn my back from them to ring out the bloody cloths, too ashamed to face them.

What would my mother think? I might as well have been the one to cut her wings off.

What would my brothers think?

My mate?

How could I look into their eyes, with their wings out, and act like I didn't just cut someone else's off?

How could I let my wings out? How could I fly again, touch the clouds, and feel the stars shining on my skin when I ripped off someone else's freedom to do so?

"We aren't blaming you, princess," Laila says softly. I turn around to all three of them already looking at me.

"Please, Arya is fine," I certainly don't feel deserving of the title of a princess. Not today, and maybe not ever.

"You couldn't have known what she was planning. And if you hadn't cut our wings off ..." Hugh trails off but Nadia finishes for him. "Then we might not even be alive today. She would have won."

My chin trembles at the kindness in their eyes, something I don't deserve.

•❅───✧❅✦❅✧───❅•

I hadn't seen Feyre since I killed Amarantha. I checked her over right after for injuries but that seemed so futile now that she was fae and her healing abilities were taking over. Tamlin whisked her away to rest and I didn't get to protest as I wanted to make sure the Illyrians were taken care of.

I heard there was a High Lord's meeting before most of them left to go back home, so I hadn't seen Rhysand either.

Some of the High Lords came up to me, thanking me for my service.

Service.

As if I was some creature they made a bargain with to do their bidding. Just like how the King of Hybern made me his assassin. And maybe that was not their intention, but with their choice of words it still stung all the same.

I walked around the dimmed walls of Under the Mountain, in pursuit of meeting with my brother.

Feyre's voice is what I heard first, "Are you going to fly home?"

The soft laugh from my brother softened the pain in my heart a bit. "Unfortunately, it would take longer than I can afford. Another day, I'll taste the skies again."

Could I fly again?

I scrape the bottom of my boots against the floor to announce my arrival, "How does it feel to be a High Fae?" I asked Feyre softly.

Her eyes grew wide at my appearance, eyes roaming down my still bloodied leathers. Maybe I should've changed first. She meets my eyes before answering, "I'm an immortal, who has been mortal. This body is different, but this," she puts a hand on her chest, her heart. "This is still human. Maybe it always will be. But it would have been easier to live with what I did if my heart had changed, too."

It was Rhys who answered, "Be glad of your human heart, Feyre. Pity those who don't feel anything at all."

"Take it from me that it still hurts all the same, Feyre," I admit.