"These paintings... Oh, and look at that flower..."
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After finding out that unfortunately, Toya won't be visiting that often anymore from a letter, my mood seemed be impacted by the sudden change and started to be more dejected for the past few days. Loneliness can do alot to a normal person sometimes, apparently... At least Sakuranomiya is here with me.
My connection with my parents seem to have worsened, in fact. My mother doesn't communicate with me or knock on my door anymore. Instead, she orders and instructs my maid to tell me important things or deliver letters. According to Sakuranomiya, I seemed to have been more distraught and lost in thought alot more often.
I shouldn't be upset about my mother. I know I'm not, but then...
If I'm not upset, then why do I feel much more depressed? There really shouldn't be a reason for me to feel like this.
...Maybe it's just Toya again.
I felt the cool water splash and drip onto me as I slowly turned the shower on. Reminds of an old encounter...not a happy or sad time either.
It feels like I'm all alone in this unfair, painful world even though I obviously aren't. Many people are out there suffering, alot more than what I'm even going through.
Letting out a quiet sigh, I let the cold water spill over my body for a bit as I overthink about the most unnecessary things before abruptly pushing those thoughts away into the depths of my mind. I don't need to think about it right now, or do I?
I feel... somewhat empty? I've finally realized that no one is here to help and support me.
The door filled with hope as well as happiness inside my childish imagination has long ago closed and faded into darkness.
But still, a crack of light seeping through the endless darkness urges me to continue on, no matter the circumstances.
"I wonder what it's like to just go to school like a normal student..."
Knock.
A sudden knock disrupted me from my upsetting thoughts.
